Every kaijuphile's dream almost comes true in Marc Cerasini's fourth and final book in his Godzilla series. I'm sure we all fantasized about the ginormous tussle that would take place if Toho's stable of robot monsters were to come together in one story. While budget constraints may have prevented Toho from realizing this dream, it's no extra cost to include many complex kaiju in a book. Unless you count licensing fees. Godzilla vs. The Robot Monsters employs Mechagodzilla, MOGUERA, and Mecha-King Ghidorah, each metal monstrosity controlled by a different nation for their own purposes. Throw in Godzilla, Anguirus, and a couple others, and you have the makings of a man vs. nature epic unlike any kaiju story before it. But something went wrong.
While Godzilla at World's End was awesome because it had one great plot, Robot Monsters takes a hit because of the problem that plagued Godzilla 2000: One too many storylines going on at once. Although the problem wasn't as bad as 2000's, plus most of the storylines eventually combined with the main one. So while it starts out in branches, it heads to the same path.
This book contains forty pages less than the previous one and offers one less kaiju. Well, technically two, since I consider Ghidorah and Mecha-Ghidorah to be one.
Kaiju Cast
Godzilla- After clawing out of the earth from an active volcano, Godzilla returns home to Japan to defend his turf from a "new" foe.
Mecha-King Ghidorah- The extraterrestrial terror is revived and suited with mechanical components. Now a cyborg under control of a ruthless Mongolian warlord, the tri-headed dragon is more evil than ever.
Anguirus- Russia's own kaiju threat, this time the spiked beast takes on the role of destructor rather than savior.
Baragon- Awakened by an underground mine blast, this dinosaur-like kaiju has a monster-sized hunger that seemingly can't be satisfied. With a glowing horn and incredible jumping and burrowing abilities, this mythical beast terrorizes an Indian reservation.
Mechagodzilla- A robotic double of the King of the Monsters, developed jointly by America and Japan. This super-weapon is operated via mind control for top maneuverability.
MOGUERA- Mobile Operation Godzilla Universal Expert Robot Aero-type. A mechanical monster built by the Russians for defending their homeland.
Fire Rodan- Mutated pteranodon with the ability to fly at Mach 1.5. Suspiciously fertile.
Story
The story begins a year after King Ghidorah's defeat at Godzilla's hands. Apparently, he was too battered to survive, especially since he lost his middle head. It's unknown how he did manage to live for twelve months, and where he spent this time, but he crash lands in Mongolia in a comatose state. On cue, a brutal Mongolian tyrant and his troops appear and claim the fallen space monster. Meanwhile, a weakened Godzilla wanders beneath the Earth's crust following his duel with Biollante in the previous book. While looking for a way out, he collapses in a river of lava and would surely have perished if he didn't flow into an underground chamber rich with radioactive ore.
A Russian oil drilling station in the Caspian Sea draws the attention of Anguirus, who plows through the naval defense force before wiping out the structure itself. This prompts the Russian government to launch their kaiju-like war machine MOGUERA ahead of schedule. Their intention is to capture him alive in a containment facility to symbolize the power of the new Russia.
While MOGUERA is given a few test runs through an obstacle course in preparation, another mech is being built in a Mongolian robot factory. In the three years since the remains of King Ghidorah is seized, he was slowly being turned into a cyborg. The intention is to use a young girl to link her mind with the gold dragon's in order to control it. But there are difficulties, as the free-willed monster snaps out of its electronically induced trance and nearly trashes the facility. A few lives are lost before its half-conscious state is restored.
Anguirus climbs out of the Caspian Sea after being attracted by the sounds of a pumping oil field. It was merely a trap to draw the spiky shelled dinosaur into battle with MOGUERA. The two monstrosities begin to grapple, with the flesh and bone kaiju overwhelming his metal attacker. After being stunned by electricity-based mazer attacks and falling over after destroying a tower, Anguirus is finally injected with a sedative by MOGUERA, which quickly takes effect and puts the aggressive creature to sleep.
A volcano on the island of Krakatau explodes, unleashing the King of the Monsters to the surface of the Earth once more. When he heads into the water, he is immediately tailed by a French warship, the captain of which was inadvertently responsible for waking Godzilla about a decade earlier. After difficulties in getting Godzilla at the proper distance in order to safely launch their nuclear payload, the radioactive dinosaur creeps upon the ship and smashes it like a brittle piece of Styrofoam.
The unconscious Anguirus is tied to giant helium balloons and transported towards the containment facility by helicopters. But while flying over the city of Moscow, terrorists fire rockets at the airborne supports, taking out enough of them to send the quadrupedal lizard plummeting to the busy capital below.
On an Indian reservation in Montana, an explosion in a uranium mine disturbs the rest of the prehistoric kaiju known as Baragon. After such a long hibernation period, he begins to seek out food to satisfy his hunger, terrorizing animals and humans alike.
Fire Rodan is spotted flying towards U.S. soil from the Atlantic Ocean, taking out a naval destroyer on the way. He eventually heads to Pittsburgh, landing in a baseball stadium and causing many casualties among spectators and ballplayers. He eventually decides upon a peak in the Appalachian mountains to build a new nest.
Now awake, Anguirus starts to tear Moscow up while Russian military units try to lead it toward the prepared containment unit. They are successful, and MOGUERA shows up to put him down once more and lock him up at last.
When the Chinese military starts to strike the border of Mongolia, Mecha-King Ghidorah appears and easily devastates the whole of them. The Mongolian warlord decides that his super cyborg has the ability to conquer the world, and begins by attacking Beijing.
In the town of Denning, the medicine man of the Blackfoot Indian tribe stands up to Baragon. Using the magic arts possessed by his ancestors, he strikes the large lizard with a concentrated bolt of lightning from the heavens above, sending the monster into retreat. But Baragon's troubles are only beginning when Mechagodzilla confronts him. Despite a valiant effort to take the heavy robot down with bites and leaps, the mutated dinosaur is injected with shock cables and zapped with millions of volts of electricity. Unable to overcome the King of Robot Monsters, Baragon escapes by burrowing miles into the Earth from whence it came.
The Mongolian dictator declares war on Japan, prompting Mechagodzilla and MOGUERA to fly to Tokyo to fight off the cyborg kaiju as a team. When Mecha-King Ghidorah finally arrives, it's an all-out war of colliding metal and searing beams. The phenomenally powerful Ghidorah fights off his enemies very well... until Godzilla, who has finally returned "home", joins the battle. The kaiju king resumes his battle with Ghidorah, this time in the capital of Japan instead of America. But to the surprise of all, MOGUERA turns its attack towards the newcomer and fires injection needles into Godzilla's flesh, pumping him full of a powerful toxin. It turns out the Russian Colonel, who commandeered the controls from the main MOGUERA crew, has killing off the King of the Monsters as his top priority. But the battle is far from over as Godzilla overtakes the traitorous robot, pinning it against a building and tearing it to pieces with his claws and radioactive fire. As this happens, Mechagodzilla is getting trampled by Mecha-King Ghidorah, but the distracted Mongolian machine is eventually knocked down by Godzilla. With his powerful foe down, the nuclear dinosaur starts to tear him to bits as well, as the uprighted Mechagodzilla chips in with a barrage of explosives. In a last ditch effort, Mecha-King Ghidorah breaks away and flies towards the Sea of Japan. The young girl who piloted the three-headed cyborg finally comes to her senses and crashes her vessel into the flagship that housed the Mongolian dictator, taking him out, as well as herself and King Ghidorah once and for all.
Analysis
There seemed to be no less than six storylines going on at the same time, although equal time was certainly not devoted to all of them: Godzilla's return. Rodan reproducing. Ghidorah's revival. Baragon grazing. Anguirus and MOGUERA's feud. Mechagodzilla's controller impatient about finally getting to control Mechagodzilla. The only monster battles in the entire book are Anguirus vs. MOGUERA, Baragon vs. Mechagodzilla, and Mecha-King Ghidorah vs. Mechagodzilla, MOGUERA, and Godzilla. Disappointing after World's End, which had more fights than the line-up of Wrestlemania 2000.
The main monsters, according to page time they received, were Baragon, MOGUERA, and Anguirus, in that order. And Baragon only appears after half the book is over. But if we want to talk about who stars in the book as far as exposure goes, it has to go to the crew members of MOGUERA and the Indians of the Blackfoot tribe. To borrow and alter a quote from Ian Malcolm of the first Jurassic Park movie: "Now eventually you might have MONSTERS in your MONSTER book, right?" That might be a slight exaggeration, but really, why did we pick up this book in the first place?
The storylines that received the most page time were Baragon's ravaging of Montana and the MOGUERA unit itself. The giant horned lizard's attempt to turn the Blackfoot Indian reservation into his own all-you-can-eat buffet was the high-point of the entire book. Cattle, buffalo, cowboys, Indians, and business men were indiscriminately pounced on and devoured. With Mechagodzilla's crew on a promotional tour of Russia, there was no force in America that could fend the beast off, but then the book takes a mystical turn when one of the characters finally decides to take up the mantle of shaman for his tribe.
The motivation behind Anguirus' attack is never explained. Sure, a wild kaiju doesn't really need a reason to run amok, but in the previous story, he existed only in legend before surfacing for the first time with the sole purpose of defeating Gigan. He was an earth defender last time, so why does he start destroying real estate for the hell of it?
Fire Rodan returns from Godzilla 2000. It was his offspring that was featured in Word's End, remember? Papa Rodan had absolutely no reason to be in this book, as all he did was mimic his also pointless role from last time. He flew to America, destroyed a structure or two, laid an egg, and flew back home with his brood. That's it. He participated in no storyline, thus contributed nothing. His offspring had a much more limited role in the last book, but it actually played a part in the outcome by saving the humans from being grounded by Battra. But despite this gripe, what little he did was a bit of a good read. He landed in the new ballpark of the Pittsburgh Pirates, probably thinking it to be a concrete nest. Cerasini does a good job showing what would happen if this airborne kaiju were to touch down in a stadium, with much detail paid to the accidental death and destruction his mass and wings would cause. It's worth noting that Cerasini is a native of Pittsburgh, so this may be a tribute, albeit a twisted one, to his hometown. I'm sure if I wrote a story where the Boston Red Sox were crushed to death, my fellow New Englanders would string me up like a pinata.
My last major disagreement with the way this story was handled concerns Mechagodzilla, who only shows up towards the end. Mechagodzilla is one of the most popular monsters in Toho's kaiju catalog who should have had a lot more effort put into his first appearance in this Godzilla book series. The robot monster's pilot is given more attention, and as I stated in a previous review, no one looks at Godzilla media for the human cast, they want the monsters. The least we could have asked for was a first meeting between Godzilla and his metal clone so more time could have been devoted to them, as they are featured prominently on the book's cover. Speaking of the cover, another masterpiece by artist Bob Eggleton, it depicts Godzilla and Mechagodzilla facing off over a Russian landscape as Anguirus is bombarded with missiles in the foreground. So just by looking at it in the store, you'd probably expect a grand battle between the two akin to their movie counterparts somewhere within its fifteen chapters. But no, they don't even as much as scratch each other, but battle on the same side. This would have been fine, considering the fact that both monsters are varying degrees of "good" who face a common enemy, but again, the cover foreshadows a conflict, and the name of the book itself is Godzilla vs. The Robot Monsters, and the one monster he battled was only half robot. Everything about the presentation was misleading.
G-Force returns from Godzilla 2000, as The Big G is viewed as an immediate worry as opposed to the last book where there were more immanent kaiju threats to take care of. The flying ship Garuda from the film Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla II makes an appearance to aid MechaG in his travels. After three books, Nick Gordon is finally dropped even though his character was finally turned tolerable in the last book. But we do see the return of the first book's main character, Brian Shimura, who covers the conclusive battle and just happens to be the uncle of a member of G-Force.
There is a noticable error in the time line between this book and the predecessor. Godzilla at World's End ended on January 22nd, 2001, but this book begins December 13th, 2000. While I at first figured that the prologue featuring the discovery of King Ghidorah could have occurred during the events of the previous book, it tells us that "at that moment", Godzilla is wandering through the center of the Earth where he was left at the conclusion of the last book.
Something that caught my eye was a brief scene to illustrate Godzilla finally setting "foot" on Japanese soil once again. It featured two factory workers named Ken and Ryu. A reference to the two main fighters of the Street Fighter video game series? Then Ryu states "I'd rather be driving my car than spending time with my girlfriend, any day." There aren't really any guys who think like that, are there?
Once again, the book's main selling point occurs in the last couple of chapters. But overall, the story was still good, but it was a wasted opportunity. The Baragon and Anguirus segments play a big part in entertainment value. Godzilla and Mechagodzilla fight on the same side for the first time in any Toho endorsed lore. Unless you count video games where two players could choose those monsters and compete as a team. Which I don't and neither should you. This book is also the first in the series where Mothra doesn't make any appearance, but it's fine because her help wasn't needed. And despite everything going on, it would have been better if the book was longer to devote more attention to those storylines which received little. Generally, Godzilla vs. The Robot Monsters should have contained more scenes of Godzilla versing robot monsters.
Book Roles vs. Movie Roles
The norm of Cerasini's Godzilla novels is that he invents unique new origins for existing monsters. Here's some small descriptions of the parts they played in the movies that inspired their appearances here:
-Mecha-King Ghidorah was originally a hero. After Godzilla whipped his tail in a fight that also saw the three-headed monster lose his central head, visitors from the future revived the carcass with their modern technology, and a few robotic enhancements, to put a stop to Godzilla's rampage.
-The G-Force Mechagodzilla was created solely by Japan out of the scraps of Mecha-King Ghidorah. So this story could never occur in the Heisei series since one monster is made out of the remains of another.
-MOGUERA was also a Japanese G-Force creation. In the films, he could split into two different mechs; one airborne and a ground-based vehicle that could tunnel underground.
Godzilla vs. The Robot Monsters ends with several unique prospects for future installments. Godzilla is poisoned by a concoction cooked up by the Russians, leaving us to wonder how it will effect him in a sequel. Baragon is supposedly buried underground once more, but we can all assume that a massive monster who can burrow like a mole could resurface any time he pleases. Anguirus is contained within a pen in Russia, but you know such a hostile kaiju can't remain imprisoned for long. Mechagodzilla, MOGUERA, and Mecha-King Ghidorah are destroyed forever, but who's to say the two robot monsters can't be rebuilt again? And Rodan is home at the North Pole once more, waiting to appear in every other book to do nothing more than lay eggs. I just can't wait to see what's cooked up for the fifth book.
Sadly, waiting and seeing isn't even an option anymore. Although a fifth was planned, Toho's deal with Random House expired. It's too bad, because we'll never find out how much offspring a single Rodan can yield in its lifetime. Godzilla and The Lost Continent was the planned sequel, which would have seen the returns of Varan, Manda, and Battra. Though they got their tails (or abdomens) kicked, we never actually see them perish. I also wonder if Gigan or Megalon would have shown up, two others who disappeared without us truly discovering their fates. The premise is that a new Texas-sized continent surfaces from beneath the ocean. So naturally the world's nations decide to play "finder's keepers" with their weapons at the forefront. But the aforementioned monsters have already claimed it as their own. The hook here is that ancient ruins are discovered, as well as survivors of a nearly extinct race. Not only that, what's described as "a totally new monster" shows up with the power to devastate all the world's armies. Would this be a brand new Cerasini created kaiju? Or just a Toho creation that hasn't shown up in the novels yet? The idea of an ancient civilization coming back to life harkens back to Godzilla at World's End, the best book in the series, so I would like to think that this new story would have been at least as good. but I guess we'll never find out...
My favorite novels in this series from best to worst are Godzilla at World's End, Godzilla Returns, Godzilla vs. The Robot Monsters, and Godzilla 2000. You might probably judge by my reviews of a couple of these books that I hated them, but that is far from the truth. I've basically been reviewing them for what they were: Godzilla adventures. For what they were, the numerous human portions of the stories were excellent, but if I wanted a people story, I would have picked one out. I'll probably go back to these books and read them again someday. It's a crime to think these fantastic books were priced from 4.99 (the first) to 5.99 (the rest). For their quality, they were worth much more.
Then again, who's to say that a lot of the problems I griped about were even Cerasini's original intentions? If anyone's ever paid attention to the development processes of Godzilla ventures handled by outside companies, you would know how controlling (compassionate) Toho is about their lunch tickets. They are very particular about how their kaiju are handled, so who's to say that potentially great books like 2000 and Robot Monsters were heavily altered by the Toho reps? Sure, it's an unnecessary handicap when the franchise is in the capable hands of an obvious fan like Cerasini, but Toho's guidelines are also required to prevent Godzilla's good name to be sullied by the likes of Sony/Tristar's 1998 Zilla movie. The reason why it was such a blasphemous deviation is because Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich took the Godzilla guidelines and basically used them as emergency wipes in case their trailers ran out of toilet paper. So while admitted non-Godzilla fans like Devlin and Emmerich could have used the guidelines, I think giving Cerasini a bit more rope to do his own thing would have made his already awesome works far more enjoyable. Speaking of that abomination against Godzilla, rumor has it that the reason why Random House didn't release the final Godzilla book before their rights expired is due to the poor reaction to the Zilla movie. So not only did that mutated iguana kill the real G's image in America, it also made sure that the paper used to print out copies of Lost Continent remained in the trees.
And that's just the way it is.
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
January 27, 2008
January 8, 2008
Godzilla and the End of the World
G-Zilla returns to rack up more collateral damage in an effort to save mankind in Godzilla at World's End, the third novel in Marc Cerasini's Godzilla series of books. After the underwhelming Godzilla 2000, which had about five different plots going on at once, this book forgivingly revolves around a single calamity. Once again dealing with a threat to all life on Earth, our worries originate from below us as opposed to above.
While 2000 only had a kaiju count of six, World's End employs a whopping ten monsters to battle over Earth's future. And the scary thing is, even though the same amount of pages are used in this book and the previous, Cerasini does a much more satisfying job utilizing the kaiju this time around, even though there were four more of them to worry about. The havoc is also spread more across the globe, rather than brief stopovers in France and Britain before focusing on the States.
Kaiju Cast
Godzilla- rises up from the ocean depths to defend Nature from those who seek to harm her.
Mothra- once more appears in a single character's dream sequence to clue her in on the true cause of the kaiju uprising.
Anguirus- a monster thought only to exist in legend, the spiked saurian defends his apparent homeland Russia from monster invaders.
Rodan- the hatchling from the previous book has done some growing up and takes up the mantle of "Defender of the Skies".
Gigan- a viscious cyborg with sharp limbs that seeks to eliminate the world's satellite communications.
Manda- a traditional-looking Chinese dragon who goes medieval in Shanghai.
Megalon- the towering cockroach with drill hands rains his lightning on South America.
Hedorah- an extremely lethal monster comprised of toxic sludge and gas, he has the ability to go airborne to spread poisonous death across the populace, or transverse the ground for a more direct approach to those who may threaten him.
Battra- a sinister looking insect monster who is a dark parallel to Mothra, both in appearance and intentions.
Biollante- the ultimate weapon employed by the mysterious warmongers to wipe out humanity once and for all. A massive plant kaiju with a monstrous maw and ever-growing vine tendrils.
Story
The story begins eight years in the past at the literal "end of the world", Antarctica. A young explorer discovers her frozen-to-death father at the bottom of a pit. After being menaced by giant plant vines, an earthquake opens up the ground beneath her and consumes both her and her father's corpse.
In the present time, America is still trying to rebuild itself after the devastation caused by Godzilla's rumble with King Ghidorah. Also, a technologically advanced flying airship called Destiny Explorer is being prepped for its maiden flight to Antarctica.
At the same time, the South Pole is hit with disaster as a giant abyss opens up from within the earth and the gigantic cyborg Gigan is set loose upon the world. It's first mission is to fly into the atmosphere and destroy all the Earth's satellites in an effort to cripple communications. Russia launches a nuclear missile in response, but all it succeeds in doing is drawing the monster to them in retaliation.
Bursting from the crust of Peru, insectoid kaiju Megalon tears up a small settlement in Lima. Burrowing up from an unfinished tunnel in China, the serpentine dragon Manda puts the squeeze on Shanghai. Each country's respective militaries fail to repel their monster threats, and it seems those countries are about to crumble when the Earth's own defenders arrive to counter the threats. Godzilla rises from the East China Sea to grapple with Manda. The spiky Anguirus surfaces from the Caspian Sea to tackle Gigan. After trying battles, both of the saurian sea monsters successfully dragged their unconscious foes into the churning waves, no longer a threat for the foreseeable future. The combined U.S. and Peru militaries manage to drive Megalon into the Amazon rain forest.
But the mysterious forces from within the earth that unleashed the previous terrors aren't finished. Launching from the Pacific Ocean and flying over Osaka, the smog monster Hedorah begins to choke out the populace with his toxic gas and sludge. The repulsive moth Battra chases the Destiny Explorer in Chile. Instinctively, Godzilla hones in on Hedorah, and Rodan's offspring arrives to fight off Battra. Both dispatch their opponents with ease.
The climax sees the Destiny Explorer fly into the earth itself through the abyss created in the South Pole, with Godzilla hot on its heels. Who or what are the unknown aggressors to mankind's livelihood? And will they be successful in their war when they play their trump card in the form of Biollante?
Analysis
In the spirit of the Showa series of films, it's great to see Godzilla and his running buddies Rodan and Anguirus fighting against the forces of evil. However they all fight solo instead of the tag team battles usually seen in the films.
It's revealed that the evil kaiju that attack humanity were created by those that dwell at the center of the world in an effort to retake the surface for themselves. Author Cerasini had to look through the back catalog of Toho kaiju and select six monsters he best felt could have been manufactured by a subterranean race of creatures. I feel he chose well, as the creatures he chose are too unnatural to have been born by normal means, although I'd like to think that Manda and Battra already existed and were being mind-controlled by "the ancient ones". Let's have a quick review of the original origins of the sinister monsters: Gigan was a weapon created by aliens from Space Hunter Nebula M. Hedorah was an alien tadpole that fell from space from a meteor and grew into a pollution-based monster after feeding on Earth's refuse. Megalon and Manda were originally gods of the undersea kingdoms of Seatopia and Mu respectively. Battra was the dark parallel of Mothra, both of whom had a serious quarrel at the beginning of time. His goal was to defend the earth, but from human threats as opposed to kaiju. Biollante was created by a scientist combining the DNA of Godzilla, a rose, and his deceased daughter.
Other problems in the previous book have been addressed, such as a smaller human cast to care about, no elaborate back stories on people who exist only to expire in a few pages, and no overpowered military beating the supposed-to-be indestructible kaiju within an inch of their lives. However, if there were a couple of parts I could still change, it would be to have the cast spend more time in the underground city, as opposed to the final two chapters. Cerasini repeatedly compares Godzilla's head to that of a cat's. The only thing remotely cat-like about Godzilla's head is his nose. He also seems to want us to believe that Megalon and Battra resemble each other, but anyone who's ever actually seen them before will wonder what he is on about. Nick Gordon returns once more in a bigger role, but it appears his character has matured since the first book as he no longer spouts off line after line of annoying remarks. There's also two small and interesting side plots about a Russian patrol ship following Godzilla in an effort to secure samples of his blood, as well as the Big G attacking a freighter to consume its plutonium cargo.
The unnamed President of the United States in the story is eerily similar to the current real-life one, George W. Bush. It wasn't intentional, as this book was published before Dubya entered office. After major crisis strikes, he fails to adequately respond to and rebuild the areas damaged. The administration is referred to as arrogant and introduces programs which will not solve the problems facing the country. They wasted billions of taxpayer dollars several times over, fuel prices rocketed, and Americans were forced to adopt new rules and regulations that adversely affected their lives. This fictional President goes on to declare a state of emergency, puts the country under martial law, and suspends the upcoming elections. Hopefully that action won't be echoed by the real President.
I can't believe I just used a review on a Godzilla book to take potshots at Bush Jr. But I'll be damned if Godzilla didn't cause as much devastation on the fictional America than Dubya did on the real one.
The exquisite front cover of the book was once again crafted by Bob Eggleton. It features Godzilla, Biollante, and the Destiny Explorer airship within the earth's icy interior. On the back cover, it appears the synopsis was made before the final story was sent to the printers. It says that Megalon attacks Russia and Gigan invades South America, but the reverse is true. Of course, this could also just be an honest mistake. I just had to point this out because I'm a prick.
There seems to be a "moral" embedded within the human portion of the story. Not one, not two, but three young female characters have been spending their lives trying to imitate their father's aspirations. It also leads to be the key faults in their personalities. So remember kids: You don't have to follow exactly in your parent's footsteps; do what you want to do with your life.
Godzilla at World's End is the best book so far, and one I would love to see in movie form.
And that's just the way it is.
While 2000 only had a kaiju count of six, World's End employs a whopping ten monsters to battle over Earth's future. And the scary thing is, even though the same amount of pages are used in this book and the previous, Cerasini does a much more satisfying job utilizing the kaiju this time around, even though there were four more of them to worry about. The havoc is also spread more across the globe, rather than brief stopovers in France and Britain before focusing on the States.
Kaiju Cast
Godzilla- rises up from the ocean depths to defend Nature from those who seek to harm her.
Mothra- once more appears in a single character's dream sequence to clue her in on the true cause of the kaiju uprising.
Anguirus- a monster thought only to exist in legend, the spiked saurian defends his apparent homeland Russia from monster invaders.
Rodan- the hatchling from the previous book has done some growing up and takes up the mantle of "Defender of the Skies".
Gigan- a viscious cyborg with sharp limbs that seeks to eliminate the world's satellite communications.
Manda- a traditional-looking Chinese dragon who goes medieval in Shanghai.
Megalon- the towering cockroach with drill hands rains his lightning on South America.
Hedorah- an extremely lethal monster comprised of toxic sludge and gas, he has the ability to go airborne to spread poisonous death across the populace, or transverse the ground for a more direct approach to those who may threaten him.
Battra- a sinister looking insect monster who is a dark parallel to Mothra, both in appearance and intentions.
Biollante- the ultimate weapon employed by the mysterious warmongers to wipe out humanity once and for all. A massive plant kaiju with a monstrous maw and ever-growing vine tendrils.
Story
The story begins eight years in the past at the literal "end of the world", Antarctica. A young explorer discovers her frozen-to-death father at the bottom of a pit. After being menaced by giant plant vines, an earthquake opens up the ground beneath her and consumes both her and her father's corpse.
In the present time, America is still trying to rebuild itself after the devastation caused by Godzilla's rumble with King Ghidorah. Also, a technologically advanced flying airship called Destiny Explorer is being prepped for its maiden flight to Antarctica.
At the same time, the South Pole is hit with disaster as a giant abyss opens up from within the earth and the gigantic cyborg Gigan is set loose upon the world. It's first mission is to fly into the atmosphere and destroy all the Earth's satellites in an effort to cripple communications. Russia launches a nuclear missile in response, but all it succeeds in doing is drawing the monster to them in retaliation.
Bursting from the crust of Peru, insectoid kaiju Megalon tears up a small settlement in Lima. Burrowing up from an unfinished tunnel in China, the serpentine dragon Manda puts the squeeze on Shanghai. Each country's respective militaries fail to repel their monster threats, and it seems those countries are about to crumble when the Earth's own defenders arrive to counter the threats. Godzilla rises from the East China Sea to grapple with Manda. The spiky Anguirus surfaces from the Caspian Sea to tackle Gigan. After trying battles, both of the saurian sea monsters successfully dragged their unconscious foes into the churning waves, no longer a threat for the foreseeable future. The combined U.S. and Peru militaries manage to drive Megalon into the Amazon rain forest.
But the mysterious forces from within the earth that unleashed the previous terrors aren't finished. Launching from the Pacific Ocean and flying over Osaka, the smog monster Hedorah begins to choke out the populace with his toxic gas and sludge. The repulsive moth Battra chases the Destiny Explorer in Chile. Instinctively, Godzilla hones in on Hedorah, and Rodan's offspring arrives to fight off Battra. Both dispatch their opponents with ease.
The climax sees the Destiny Explorer fly into the earth itself through the abyss created in the South Pole, with Godzilla hot on its heels. Who or what are the unknown aggressors to mankind's livelihood? And will they be successful in their war when they play their trump card in the form of Biollante?
Analysis
In the spirit of the Showa series of films, it's great to see Godzilla and his running buddies Rodan and Anguirus fighting against the forces of evil. However they all fight solo instead of the tag team battles usually seen in the films.
It's revealed that the evil kaiju that attack humanity were created by those that dwell at the center of the world in an effort to retake the surface for themselves. Author Cerasini had to look through the back catalog of Toho kaiju and select six monsters he best felt could have been manufactured by a subterranean race of creatures. I feel he chose well, as the creatures he chose are too unnatural to have been born by normal means, although I'd like to think that Manda and Battra already existed and were being mind-controlled by "the ancient ones". Let's have a quick review of the original origins of the sinister monsters: Gigan was a weapon created by aliens from Space Hunter Nebula M. Hedorah was an alien tadpole that fell from space from a meteor and grew into a pollution-based monster after feeding on Earth's refuse. Megalon and Manda were originally gods of the undersea kingdoms of Seatopia and Mu respectively. Battra was the dark parallel of Mothra, both of whom had a serious quarrel at the beginning of time. His goal was to defend the earth, but from human threats as opposed to kaiju. Biollante was created by a scientist combining the DNA of Godzilla, a rose, and his deceased daughter.
Other problems in the previous book have been addressed, such as a smaller human cast to care about, no elaborate back stories on people who exist only to expire in a few pages, and no overpowered military beating the supposed-to-be indestructible kaiju within an inch of their lives. However, if there were a couple of parts I could still change, it would be to have the cast spend more time in the underground city, as opposed to the final two chapters. Cerasini repeatedly compares Godzilla's head to that of a cat's. The only thing remotely cat-like about Godzilla's head is his nose. He also seems to want us to believe that Megalon and Battra resemble each other, but anyone who's ever actually seen them before will wonder what he is on about. Nick Gordon returns once more in a bigger role, but it appears his character has matured since the first book as he no longer spouts off line after line of annoying remarks. There's also two small and interesting side plots about a Russian patrol ship following Godzilla in an effort to secure samples of his blood, as well as the Big G attacking a freighter to consume its plutonium cargo.
The unnamed President of the United States in the story is eerily similar to the current real-life one, George W. Bush. It wasn't intentional, as this book was published before Dubya entered office. After major crisis strikes, he fails to adequately respond to and rebuild the areas damaged. The administration is referred to as arrogant and introduces programs which will not solve the problems facing the country. They wasted billions of taxpayer dollars several times over, fuel prices rocketed, and Americans were forced to adopt new rules and regulations that adversely affected their lives. This fictional President goes on to declare a state of emergency, puts the country under martial law, and suspends the upcoming elections. Hopefully that action won't be echoed by the real President.
I can't believe I just used a review on a Godzilla book to take potshots at Bush Jr. But I'll be damned if Godzilla didn't cause as much devastation on the fictional America than Dubya did on the real one.
The exquisite front cover of the book was once again crafted by Bob Eggleton. It features Godzilla, Biollante, and the Destiny Explorer airship within the earth's icy interior. On the back cover, it appears the synopsis was made before the final story was sent to the printers. It says that Megalon attacks Russia and Gigan invades South America, but the reverse is true. Of course, this could also just be an honest mistake. I just had to point this out because I'm a prick.
There seems to be a "moral" embedded within the human portion of the story. Not one, not two, but three young female characters have been spending their lives trying to imitate their father's aspirations. It also leads to be the key faults in their personalities. So remember kids: You don't have to follow exactly in your parent's footsteps; do what you want to do with your life.
Godzilla at World's End is the best book so far, and one I would love to see in movie form.
And that's just the way it is.
December 14, 2007
Journey To The Center Of Oz
Frank Baum's young audience spoke again, this time clamoring to know more about the former Wizard of Oz. They also decided that no book about Oz would be complete unless it involved Dorothy. Baum answered their wishes with the next installment in his popular series, called Dorothy and The Wizard in Oz. Like the previous book, most of the adventure doesn't occur within Oz, but in the fairy land that surrounds it. Or rather... beneath it. The first land they go to actually borders The Nome King's Dominions.
And now, your main characters for this excursion into the bizarre world that can't be found on any map:
Dorothy Gale- While on a trip to visit family in California, an earthquake takes her on an unexpected detour.
Zebediah Hugson- Dorothy's second cousin who takes part in her new adventure after the buggy carrying both of them falls far below the earth's crust.
The Wizard- The former ruler of Oz accidentally enters a crack in the ground while trying to land his balloon and rejoins his old acquaintance from Kansas.
Jim The Cab Horse- Zeb's old horse who tows the buggy. He still has a lot of physical endurance, as well as a bad temper.
Eureka The Kitten- Dorothy's pet who thinks herself to be the center of the universe, although quite resourceful.
The Nine Tiny Piglets- The Wizard's pygmy pigs who are part of his magic act.
Now a brief introduction to the new lands our explorers... explore:
The Vegetable Kingdom- The deepest part of the earth where the gravity is so low, one can walk in midair. The citizens are human in appearance, but are actually living vegetables. They don't take too kindly to the meaty intruders, who they accuse of bringing down a rain of stones that damaged their glass homes.
The Valley of Voe- A beautiful country where a fruit grows that renders whomever eats it invisible. The kind people who inhabit this land can only be identified by their voices. Unfortunately, that also goes for the bears who also inhabit this land.
Country of the Gargoyles- Home to hideous monsters who doesn't appreciate trespassers in their land. The most curious quality of this place is that everyone and everything is made of wood.
The Emerald City- Although reunited with old friends, don't think the troubles are over for the adventurers.
You know, I would briefly recap most of the story, sans the final scenes, but it appears that my descriptions of the characters and locations have already done that job. But if that isn't enough to satisfy your curiosity, I guess you have no choice but to pick up a copy yourself and dive right in.
One must wonder why Toto never gained the ability to speak while he was in Oz. I guess because Baum never thought that he would continue writing about it after his first book, so he never considered giving outside animals the gift of speech until more of them started coming in.
And that's just the way it is.
And now, your main characters for this excursion into the bizarre world that can't be found on any map:
Dorothy Gale- While on a trip to visit family in California, an earthquake takes her on an unexpected detour.
Zebediah Hugson- Dorothy's second cousin who takes part in her new adventure after the buggy carrying both of them falls far below the earth's crust.
The Wizard- The former ruler of Oz accidentally enters a crack in the ground while trying to land his balloon and rejoins his old acquaintance from Kansas.
Jim The Cab Horse- Zeb's old horse who tows the buggy. He still has a lot of physical endurance, as well as a bad temper.
Eureka The Kitten- Dorothy's pet who thinks herself to be the center of the universe, although quite resourceful.
The Nine Tiny Piglets- The Wizard's pygmy pigs who are part of his magic act.
Now a brief introduction to the new lands our explorers... explore:
The Vegetable Kingdom- The deepest part of the earth where the gravity is so low, one can walk in midair. The citizens are human in appearance, but are actually living vegetables. They don't take too kindly to the meaty intruders, who they accuse of bringing down a rain of stones that damaged their glass homes.
The Valley of Voe- A beautiful country where a fruit grows that renders whomever eats it invisible. The kind people who inhabit this land can only be identified by their voices. Unfortunately, that also goes for the bears who also inhabit this land.
Country of the Gargoyles- Home to hideous monsters who doesn't appreciate trespassers in their land. The most curious quality of this place is that everyone and everything is made of wood.
The Emerald City- Although reunited with old friends, don't think the troubles are over for the adventurers.
You know, I would briefly recap most of the story, sans the final scenes, but it appears that my descriptions of the characters and locations have already done that job. But if that isn't enough to satisfy your curiosity, I guess you have no choice but to pick up a copy yourself and dive right in.
One must wonder why Toto never gained the ability to speak while he was in Oz. I guess because Baum never thought that he would continue writing about it after his first book, so he never considered giving outside animals the gift of speech until more of them started coming in.
And that's just the way it is.
November 23, 2007
The Y2G Problem
With the year 2000 looming close, man has one fear: the end of civilization. However, it won't be caused by crashing computers, but by massive meteors and killer kaiju. Godzilla 2000 is the second novel in Marc Cerasini's Godzilla series. Don't judge this book by its title, as it is not a novelization of the movie of the same name. This book came out in 1997, while the film was released in 1999. I'm sure you all remember that, as the century came to a close, tacking the number "2000" on everything was in style. This book is notable for being Godzilla's first major foray into the United States. I don't count the brief scene in Destroy All Monsters where Godzilla attacked New York merely by wading next to the city and blowing his breath on a single building. It's also worth pointing out that the TRUE Godzilla took Manhattan one year before the impostor Zilla did in theaters. This book is much longer than the first one, which is appropriate because there's so much more material to work with.
While Godzilla Returns was a single monster affair... I just wish I could remember which one it was... the sequel has the tagline of "The age of monsters has begun..." so we've got some of the Big G's famous co-stars tagging along for some action this time:
Godzilla- the indestructible nuclear monster rises up from the depths of the Mariana Trench and cuts a path of destruction through the United States. What could he be doing so far away from his native Japan?
King Ghidorah- a three-headed gold dragon from space who threatens to annihilate all life on Earth. Capable of spewing gravity beams that can vaporize an army vehicle in an instant.
Mothra- a massive moth who does its best to ensure peace for the Earth. She's equipped with a prism beam fired from her antennae and a pair of twin fairies who communicate with humans on her behalf.
Varan- a dinosaur that has evolved the ability to glide. Tears up real estate in search of his steady diet of humans.
Rodan- a Pteranadon that can fly at supersonic speeds. Can fire a super-heated uranium beam from his beak.
Kamacuras- gigantic mantises with an appetite to match.
The climactic battle is underwhelming when you consider that whenever a kaiju movie features several monsters in its lineup, they usually come together for a colossal brawl. Even Godzilla's old sparring partner Rodan had no part in the final outcome. His entire contribution to the story, in a nutshell (or eggshell), is flying from Alaska to South Dakota, laying an egg which immediately hatches, and then flying back home with his brood. The majority of this time is spent describing how the Special Defense Force goes about trying to stop him. But there is a nice build-up to his appearance, with an old village's shaman talking about how he's having visions of a giant Thunderbird, who was "coming to the places of man, for he may soon be needed". We needed Rodan to destroy a train and lay an egg? I feel safer already. Then there was the rare appearance of Varan, one of Toho's first monsters. He played the part of "wild monster on the loose", terrorizing the populace by feeding on them and toppling various structures. He also landed on a large ship to bask in the sun, much to the chagrin of the ship's crew. Mothra, though barely seen, played a role throughout the whole story by trying to convince a member of G-Force that Godzilla isn't the threat that he is assumed to be. It turns out Mothra was actually leading G to New York to have a showdown with King Ghidorah. As for Ghidorah, we knew he was coming since the beginning, being encased in a meteor that threatened to eliminate all life. But he didn't actually touch down on Earth until the last few chapters, trashing Paris before heading directly to New York and his eventual downfall. And if there's one thing Cerasini should get credit for, it's that he managed to do what no mortal writer has ever managed to do before: he made Kamacuras, the giant praying mantis, a credible threat. A large swarm of them ripped through America's midwest, eating all plant and animal life and laying waste to whatever wasn't edible. It must have been a terrifying time to be in the same region those mutated mantids, knowing nothing would be spared from their rampage.
Cerasini violated a cardinal rule of the Godzilla universe: never have the Special Defense Force victorious against kaiju unless they are utilizing a robot monster themselves. Kamacuras is exterminated, Varan is bombarded with firepower to an inch of his life, Godzilla is put down temporarily and the obscenely powerful Ghidorah has his middle neck blown off by a simple bomb. I can forgive the Kamacuras, merely house-sized insects, being taken down, and will even allow the idea that Godzilla's weaker cousin Varan can be fended off by the military like he was in his own movie, but King Godzilla and King Ghidorah are supposed to be indestructible to all of Earth's conventional weapons... yes, even American made ones, if you can believe that. The Japanese Special Defense Force is portrayed as being ineffective against their home grown threats, but the almighty American made G-Force goes on a kaiju killing spree. The purpose of the army, navy, and air force in kaiju movies isn't to win, it's to fail in a way that satisfies our desire for destruction. Even when the monster threat is evil, we still want them to crush those trying to save us. When a cast of characters we don't care about dispatch the kaiju we came to see/read about, it annoys us.
Waaaaaay too much time is spent describing the personal histories of people whose sole purpose in life is to be squashed. We don't care how an off-duty police man has concocted an elaborate plan to meet a pretty jogger at the beach, and we don't want to read about it for four pages only to have him die on the fifth. The worst is at the end, where Cerasini devotes a few pages to the humans that we forgot about as soon as their scene ended and the next kaiju one took place. Also seen in the book is Nick Gordon, a barely tolerable main character from the prequel. He is unmercifully dropped in press conferences, newscasts, and even as a witness to the final battle. The human cast in the previous book was better because there were less of them and more time was spent developing them. Here, Godzilla, Rodan, Varan, the Kamacuras, and King Ghidorah have their own plot points devoted to them, as well as their own small cast of human characters to react to them. Instead of reporters and NASA scientists, more time should have been devoted to G-Force, the people whose lives revolve around those this book exists for.
Much like how he described the horrific experience of being incinerated by Godzilla's nuclear breath in Godzilla Returns, Cerasini now tells us how it must feel to be splattered with G's radioactive blood and skin tissue. We seldom think about how every explosion that tears Godzilla's flesh must spray a considerable amount of gore all around the battlefield. One especially unlucky person ended up being showered with the stuff. He became violently ill, throwing up and feeling convulsions in his stomach, until just falling unconscious. We also were treated to a bonus fight where one natural disaster took on another: Godzilla vs. Tornado!
An awesome cover by Bob Eggleton depicts the kaiju apocalypse, with Godzilla rearing his head over a beam-spitting King Ghidorah as Rodan soars through the background. Although it would have been more appropriate to include Mothra in Rodan's place as the insect monster was the one who played a role in the final battle.
There's also a reference to that atrocious Blue Oyster Cult song Godzilla. That's right, I said it. I'm a Godzilla fan who hates that song.
And that's just the way it is.
While Godzilla Returns was a single monster affair... I just wish I could remember which one it was... the sequel has the tagline of "The age of monsters has begun..." so we've got some of the Big G's famous co-stars tagging along for some action this time:
Godzilla- the indestructible nuclear monster rises up from the depths of the Mariana Trench and cuts a path of destruction through the United States. What could he be doing so far away from his native Japan?
King Ghidorah- a three-headed gold dragon from space who threatens to annihilate all life on Earth. Capable of spewing gravity beams that can vaporize an army vehicle in an instant.
Mothra- a massive moth who does its best to ensure peace for the Earth. She's equipped with a prism beam fired from her antennae and a pair of twin fairies who communicate with humans on her behalf.
Varan- a dinosaur that has evolved the ability to glide. Tears up real estate in search of his steady diet of humans.
Rodan- a Pteranadon that can fly at supersonic speeds. Can fire a super-heated uranium beam from his beak.
Kamacuras- gigantic mantises with an appetite to match.
The climactic battle is underwhelming when you consider that whenever a kaiju movie features several monsters in its lineup, they usually come together for a colossal brawl. Even Godzilla's old sparring partner Rodan had no part in the final outcome. His entire contribution to the story, in a nutshell (or eggshell), is flying from Alaska to South Dakota, laying an egg which immediately hatches, and then flying back home with his brood. The majority of this time is spent describing how the Special Defense Force goes about trying to stop him. But there is a nice build-up to his appearance, with an old village's shaman talking about how he's having visions of a giant Thunderbird, who was "coming to the places of man, for he may soon be needed". We needed Rodan to destroy a train and lay an egg? I feel safer already. Then there was the rare appearance of Varan, one of Toho's first monsters. He played the part of "wild monster on the loose", terrorizing the populace by feeding on them and toppling various structures. He also landed on a large ship to bask in the sun, much to the chagrin of the ship's crew. Mothra, though barely seen, played a role throughout the whole story by trying to convince a member of G-Force that Godzilla isn't the threat that he is assumed to be. It turns out Mothra was actually leading G to New York to have a showdown with King Ghidorah. As for Ghidorah, we knew he was coming since the beginning, being encased in a meteor that threatened to eliminate all life. But he didn't actually touch down on Earth until the last few chapters, trashing Paris before heading directly to New York and his eventual downfall. And if there's one thing Cerasini should get credit for, it's that he managed to do what no mortal writer has ever managed to do before: he made Kamacuras, the giant praying mantis, a credible threat. A large swarm of them ripped through America's midwest, eating all plant and animal life and laying waste to whatever wasn't edible. It must have been a terrifying time to be in the same region those mutated mantids, knowing nothing would be spared from their rampage.
Cerasini violated a cardinal rule of the Godzilla universe: never have the Special Defense Force victorious against kaiju unless they are utilizing a robot monster themselves. Kamacuras is exterminated, Varan is bombarded with firepower to an inch of his life, Godzilla is put down temporarily and the obscenely powerful Ghidorah has his middle neck blown off by a simple bomb. I can forgive the Kamacuras, merely house-sized insects, being taken down, and will even allow the idea that Godzilla's weaker cousin Varan can be fended off by the military like he was in his own movie, but King Godzilla and King Ghidorah are supposed to be indestructible to all of Earth's conventional weapons... yes, even American made ones, if you can believe that. The Japanese Special Defense Force is portrayed as being ineffective against their home grown threats, but the almighty American made G-Force goes on a kaiju killing spree. The purpose of the army, navy, and air force in kaiju movies isn't to win, it's to fail in a way that satisfies our desire for destruction. Even when the monster threat is evil, we still want them to crush those trying to save us. When a cast of characters we don't care about dispatch the kaiju we came to see/read about, it annoys us.
Waaaaaay too much time is spent describing the personal histories of people whose sole purpose in life is to be squashed. We don't care how an off-duty police man has concocted an elaborate plan to meet a pretty jogger at the beach, and we don't want to read about it for four pages only to have him die on the fifth. The worst is at the end, where Cerasini devotes a few pages to the humans that we forgot about as soon as their scene ended and the next kaiju one took place. Also seen in the book is Nick Gordon, a barely tolerable main character from the prequel. He is unmercifully dropped in press conferences, newscasts, and even as a witness to the final battle. The human cast in the previous book was better because there were less of them and more time was spent developing them. Here, Godzilla, Rodan, Varan, the Kamacuras, and King Ghidorah have their own plot points devoted to them, as well as their own small cast of human characters to react to them. Instead of reporters and NASA scientists, more time should have been devoted to G-Force, the people whose lives revolve around those this book exists for.
Much like how he described the horrific experience of being incinerated by Godzilla's nuclear breath in Godzilla Returns, Cerasini now tells us how it must feel to be splattered with G's radioactive blood and skin tissue. We seldom think about how every explosion that tears Godzilla's flesh must spray a considerable amount of gore all around the battlefield. One especially unlucky person ended up being showered with the stuff. He became violently ill, throwing up and feeling convulsions in his stomach, until just falling unconscious. We also were treated to a bonus fight where one natural disaster took on another: Godzilla vs. Tornado!
An awesome cover by Bob Eggleton depicts the kaiju apocalypse, with Godzilla rearing his head over a beam-spitting King Ghidorah as Rodan soars through the background. Although it would have been more appropriate to include Mothra in Rodan's place as the insect monster was the one who played a role in the final battle.
There's also a reference to that atrocious Blue Oyster Cult song Godzilla. That's right, I said it. I'm a Godzilla fan who hates that song.
And that's just the way it is.
November 9, 2007
Return to Oz: The Book
Kids couldn't get enough of Oz. They pestered Frank Baum for further Oz adventures and wanted to hear more about Dorothy in particular. LFB was only happy to oblige, and set to write the greatest Oz epic yet. Ozma of Oz follows the further adventures of the new princess and her allies. Although a little shorter than the previous two stories, this one pits our friends against their greatest challenge ever.
Here is the cast this time around:
Dorothy Gale of Kansas- Traveling with Uncle Henry to Australia via ship, Dorothy falls overboard and uses a lost chicken coop to survive the storm-swept waters.
Billina- a yellow hen who also survived being lost overboard with Dorothy. She has the ability to talk, and is a proud bird who doesn't take guff from man nor nome.
Tik-Tok- a mechanical man made of copper. His brain, movement, and speech require winding up with a key to work for a twenty-four hour period and is a loyal friend.
Princess Langwidere- the only member of the Royal Family of Ev left to rule the Land of Ev. She hates her position and wishes to be absolved of her responsibility. She also owns a large array of heads of beautiful women, which she is able to switch with her own as her mood sees fit.
Princess Ozma- the courageous Princess of Oz who sets out with her army to free the Royal Family of Ev from imprisonment in Nome King's palace.
The Scarecrow-Joins Ozma on her mission.
Tin Woodman- Commands the Army of Oz on behalf of Ozma.
The Cowardly Lion- Helps pull Ozma's chariot along, and also is ridden by those slower than he is.
The Hungry Tiger- Friend of the Lion who hardly ever eats because he knows he'll only get hungry again. He refuses to eat living things because of his strong conscience.
The Sawhorse- Resumes his role as a transport, mainly for the Scarecrow. Since his last adventure, he has been plated with gold.
The Army of Oz- Comprised of twenty-seven soldiers: eight Generals, six Colonels, seven Majors, five Captains, and one private. Each rank commands the one below it, until it's up to the lone private to carry out the orders. Fortunately, that private is braver than his officers.
The Nome King- the ruler of the underworld, this deceitful king only wishes to expand his collection of ornaments by enchanting living things into them. He commands magic with a belt of jewels.
The majority of this story doesn't even take place in the Land of Oz, but is set in fairy lands that border it called the Land of Ev and the Dominion of the Nome King. After being cast overboard when the ship taking them to Australia is struck by a powerful storm, Dorothy and Billina are washed up on the shore of Ev. After they are menaced by Wheelers, a race of humanoids with wheels instead of hands or feet, they discover the copper man named Tik-Tok, who formerly belonged to Evoldo, the King of Ev. Evoldo committed suicide over the guilt of selling his wife and ten children to the Nome King. Tik-Tok easily dispatches of the Wheelers and takes Dorothy to the castle of Ev, ruled by the vain niece of the King and Queen. Named Langwidere, she owned a collection of thirty female heads of extraordinary beauty which she could interchange with her own noggin whenever she wanted. It just so happened that she was wearing one of her more bad-tempered craniums when she met Dorothy and her allies. When Dorothy refused to exchange her own pretty head for one in Langwidere's collection, the princess locked her in a tower. Fortunately for little Miss Gale, Ozma and her Emerald City entourage just so happened to be on their way for a visit with Langwidere about setting the Royal Family of Ev free from The Nome King. Dorothy is released, and she joins her friends from Oz along with Tik-Tok and Billina in order to liberate the Queen of Ev and the five princes and five princesses from the Nome King's underworld.
My favorite character in this story is Tik-Tok, a strong and smart robot who knows he is not alive and seems to be proud of that fact. It's at this point that both the Scarecrow and the Tin Woodman start to become full of themselves just because of the "gifts" the Wizard gave them. They claim to be better than Tik-Tok just because they're alive, and tell him they are smarter and more caring than he is. The Lion is more humble because he knows that the Wizard really did nothing more than hand them knick-knacks to symbolize the traits that they desired, as he claims he is still a coward. Tik-Tok does a lot more with the qualities he is programmed with than Scarecrow and the Woodman and doesn't brag about it, even going as far as to congratulate them on their so-called advantages. We saw their attitudes coming in the previous book too, with both Scarecrow and Woodman treating Jack Pumpkinhead poorly, who also made due with what he had better than those guys.
In 1985, the greatest year in the history of time, Return to Oz was released by Walt Disney Pictures. It stars a very young Fairuza Balk, who resembles a Dorothy much closer to the stories than the sixteen-year-old Judy Garland did in The Wizard of Oz. The framework of the movie is based on Ozma of Oz, although it contains certain characters, elements, and storylines from The Marvelous Land of Oz. I guess you could say they took ingredients from two different recipes, mixed it up with a few original spices and came up with a damn good cake. Using another food analogy, if The Wizard of Oz was chocolate, Return to Oz is dark chocolate. This definitely was not a musical, and the setting was far gloomier than the shiny happiness in the first movie. Younger audiences may have been frightened by the cruel Mombi, screeching Wheelers and the hideous nomes. But I was a fan when I first saw it, and still am today. If you're the kind of person who may turn their head to Return to Oz and the entire Oz book library because of the bright cheeriness that was the first movie, keep in mind that it's that first film that was a major departure in mood to the source material. As much as I recommend the Oz stories, I also say you should check out Return to Oz if you enjoy the fantasy genre. Like I said for The Wizard of Oz, I believe the Disney sequel is different enough from its source material to avoid having "book better than the movie or vice-versa" arguments.
Differences between Ozma of Oz and Return to Oz:
-No magical slippers this time, those artifacts are replaced with the bejeweled belt.
-Jack Pumpkinhead, The Gump, The Powder of Life, and the storyline about the missing Ozma are carried over from The Marvelous Land of Oz.
-The Scarecrow, The Tin Woodman, and The Cowardly Lion didn't have as big of roles in the movie, the latter two's appearances could probably be called cameos.
-The Emerald City and the yellow brick road are shown torn asunder from chaos in the film, but they are unaffected in the book and only seen at the conclusion.
-I understand there are references to later Oz books in the movie, but I have yet to get that far in the series to call attention to them.
And that's just the way it is.
Here is the cast this time around:
Dorothy Gale of Kansas- Traveling with Uncle Henry to Australia via ship, Dorothy falls overboard and uses a lost chicken coop to survive the storm-swept waters.
Billina- a yellow hen who also survived being lost overboard with Dorothy. She has the ability to talk, and is a proud bird who doesn't take guff from man nor nome.
Tik-Tok- a mechanical man made of copper. His brain, movement, and speech require winding up with a key to work for a twenty-four hour period and is a loyal friend.
Princess Langwidere- the only member of the Royal Family of Ev left to rule the Land of Ev. She hates her position and wishes to be absolved of her responsibility. She also owns a large array of heads of beautiful women, which she is able to switch with her own as her mood sees fit.
Princess Ozma- the courageous Princess of Oz who sets out with her army to free the Royal Family of Ev from imprisonment in Nome King's palace.
The Scarecrow-Joins Ozma on her mission.
Tin Woodman- Commands the Army of Oz on behalf of Ozma.
The Cowardly Lion- Helps pull Ozma's chariot along, and also is ridden by those slower than he is.
The Hungry Tiger- Friend of the Lion who hardly ever eats because he knows he'll only get hungry again. He refuses to eat living things because of his strong conscience.
The Sawhorse- Resumes his role as a transport, mainly for the Scarecrow. Since his last adventure, he has been plated with gold.
The Army of Oz- Comprised of twenty-seven soldiers: eight Generals, six Colonels, seven Majors, five Captains, and one private. Each rank commands the one below it, until it's up to the lone private to carry out the orders. Fortunately, that private is braver than his officers.
The Nome King- the ruler of the underworld, this deceitful king only wishes to expand his collection of ornaments by enchanting living things into them. He commands magic with a belt of jewels.
The majority of this story doesn't even take place in the Land of Oz, but is set in fairy lands that border it called the Land of Ev and the Dominion of the Nome King. After being cast overboard when the ship taking them to Australia is struck by a powerful storm, Dorothy and Billina are washed up on the shore of Ev. After they are menaced by Wheelers, a race of humanoids with wheels instead of hands or feet, they discover the copper man named Tik-Tok, who formerly belonged to Evoldo, the King of Ev. Evoldo committed suicide over the guilt of selling his wife and ten children to the Nome King. Tik-Tok easily dispatches of the Wheelers and takes Dorothy to the castle of Ev, ruled by the vain niece of the King and Queen. Named Langwidere, she owned a collection of thirty female heads of extraordinary beauty which she could interchange with her own noggin whenever she wanted. It just so happened that she was wearing one of her more bad-tempered craniums when she met Dorothy and her allies. When Dorothy refused to exchange her own pretty head for one in Langwidere's collection, the princess locked her in a tower. Fortunately for little Miss Gale, Ozma and her Emerald City entourage just so happened to be on their way for a visit with Langwidere about setting the Royal Family of Ev free from The Nome King. Dorothy is released, and she joins her friends from Oz along with Tik-Tok and Billina in order to liberate the Queen of Ev and the five princes and five princesses from the Nome King's underworld.
My favorite character in this story is Tik-Tok, a strong and smart robot who knows he is not alive and seems to be proud of that fact. It's at this point that both the Scarecrow and the Tin Woodman start to become full of themselves just because of the "gifts" the Wizard gave them. They claim to be better than Tik-Tok just because they're alive, and tell him they are smarter and more caring than he is. The Lion is more humble because he knows that the Wizard really did nothing more than hand them knick-knacks to symbolize the traits that they desired, as he claims he is still a coward. Tik-Tok does a lot more with the qualities he is programmed with than Scarecrow and the Woodman and doesn't brag about it, even going as far as to congratulate them on their so-called advantages. We saw their attitudes coming in the previous book too, with both Scarecrow and Woodman treating Jack Pumpkinhead poorly, who also made due with what he had better than those guys.
In 1985, the greatest year in the history of time, Return to Oz was released by Walt Disney Pictures. It stars a very young Fairuza Balk, who resembles a Dorothy much closer to the stories than the sixteen-year-old Judy Garland did in The Wizard of Oz. The framework of the movie is based on Ozma of Oz, although it contains certain characters, elements, and storylines from The Marvelous Land of Oz. I guess you could say they took ingredients from two different recipes, mixed it up with a few original spices and came up with a damn good cake. Using another food analogy, if The Wizard of Oz was chocolate, Return to Oz is dark chocolate. This definitely was not a musical, and the setting was far gloomier than the shiny happiness in the first movie. Younger audiences may have been frightened by the cruel Mombi, screeching Wheelers and the hideous nomes. But I was a fan when I first saw it, and still am today. If you're the kind of person who may turn their head to Return to Oz and the entire Oz book library because of the bright cheeriness that was the first movie, keep in mind that it's that first film that was a major departure in mood to the source material. As much as I recommend the Oz stories, I also say you should check out Return to Oz if you enjoy the fantasy genre. Like I said for The Wizard of Oz, I believe the Disney sequel is different enough from its source material to avoid having "book better than the movie or vice-versa" arguments.
Differences between Ozma of Oz and Return to Oz:
-No magical slippers this time, those artifacts are replaced with the bejeweled belt.
-Jack Pumpkinhead, The Gump, The Powder of Life, and the storyline about the missing Ozma are carried over from The Marvelous Land of Oz.
-The Scarecrow, The Tin Woodman, and The Cowardly Lion didn't have as big of roles in the movie, the latter two's appearances could probably be called cameos.
-The Emerald City and the yellow brick road are shown torn asunder from chaos in the film, but they are unaffected in the book and only seen at the conclusion.
-I understand there are references to later Oz books in the movie, but I have yet to get that far in the series to call attention to them.
And that's just the way it is.
November 8, 2007
Journey Back to the Marvelous Land of Oz
The children spoke and L. Frank Baum listened. His acclaimed book The Wonderful Wizard of Oz soon had its first of many sequels. Titled The Marvelous Land of Oz, we rejoin old friends and meet many bizarre new ones. Whilst the movie version of the first Oz story was a loose adaptation, the second story didn't fare so well in its transition to film. Elements of it were borrowed to create the animated Journey Back to Oz in 1974. No Dorothy this time around, a boy named Tippetarius (Tip for short) is the lead character.
Meet the main characters of the book:
Tip- A young man who tirelessly does chores for Old Mombi.
Old Mombi- Tip's guardian who buys many spells and potions in an effort to become a witch.
Jack Pumpkinhead- a scarecrow of sorts Tip built from tree parts, old clothes, and topped off with a pumpkin. Dimwitted, but occasionally has a good idea. Constantly worries about his head spoiling.
Sawhorse- an abandoned wooden sawhorse that Tip brings to life. Ridden by Jack Pumpkinhead so his shoddy limbs won't wear out.
General Jinjur- a young girl who has built an army of women who want to storm the Emerald City and rule the Land of Oz themselves.
His Majesty The Scarecrow- After being appointed King of Oz at the end of the first story, The Scarecrow finds his rule challenged by Jinjur's troops.
Nick Chopper The Tin Woodman- Now with a new name, the Emperor of Winkie Country rejoins his old friend Scarecrow to help him regain control of Oz.
Mr. Highly Magnified Woggle-Bug, Thoroughly Educated (H.M. Woggle-Bug, T.E.)- A large insect with great intellect, he helps come up with good ideas to aid Tip, Jack, Scarecrow, and Tin Woodman in their bid to reclaim the Emerald City.
The Gump- Brought back to life by the Powder of Life, the disembodied head of an elk-like creature is attached to a pair of sofas and given large leaves for wings. He is the main mode of transport for the group.
Ozma- The missing and true descendant for the rulership of Oz. In order to restore order to the land, Tip's party must locate her.
The story begins in the north section of Oz known as Gillikin Country. A young man named Tip makes a break for freedom from his cruel guardian Mombi. He brings along his creation Jack Pumpkinhead, who was brought to life by the Powder of Life, which is magic he stole from Mombi. Along the way, he also uses the powder on an abadoned sawhorse to act as Jack's steed. When Tip learns that an army wishes to seize control of the Emerald City and the whole Land of Oz in the process, he and Jack head to the city to warn its king, the Scarecrow. With the danger imminent, the king escapes with his new friends to join up with The Tin Woodman to lend a hand in restoring order. They also team with a large and genius Woggle-Bug who offers his great knowledge. The party decides the wise and powerful Good Witch of the South Glinda may have a plan to liberate the Emerald City from its captors. Glinda declares the only one who can rightfully rule Oz is the daughter of the King who was in power before The Wizard blew into town. So the mission is on to find the missing princess and finally restore Oz to its rightful ruler.
Much like the first story, the adventure takes place all over Oz, and there's no shortage of curiosities to behold. My favorite character in this installment is Jack Pumpkinhead for his amusing banter with the Scarecrow. As Jack is constantly worried about his fruit head being destroyed, Scarecrow always looks on the bright side by suggesting that he could make a good pie or his seeds could be used to produce more pumpkins. None of these things reassure Jack in the least. The story concludes with a twist that would make M. Night Shyamalan envious. So with an Oz-wide journey, cool new characters, light humor, and a clever ending, I highly recommend this story as I did for the previous installment.
In another example of "signs of the times", this story contains yet another word that meant one thing in the early 1900s, but has taken on a completely new meaning in the late 2000's. And it was a difference I wasn't even aware of. Apparently... ejaculate was another word for "shouting in an excited manner". Here's a sentence I could get away with a century ago but wouldn't dare say aloud now: "I may be a bit queer, but I'm gay about it! And I'll ejaculate it to anyone who has a problem with that!"
And... um... that's just the way it is.
Meet the main characters of the book:
Tip- A young man who tirelessly does chores for Old Mombi.
Old Mombi- Tip's guardian who buys many spells and potions in an effort to become a witch.
Jack Pumpkinhead- a scarecrow of sorts Tip built from tree parts, old clothes, and topped off with a pumpkin. Dimwitted, but occasionally has a good idea. Constantly worries about his head spoiling.
Sawhorse- an abandoned wooden sawhorse that Tip brings to life. Ridden by Jack Pumpkinhead so his shoddy limbs won't wear out.
General Jinjur- a young girl who has built an army of women who want to storm the Emerald City and rule the Land of Oz themselves.
His Majesty The Scarecrow- After being appointed King of Oz at the end of the first story, The Scarecrow finds his rule challenged by Jinjur's troops.
Nick Chopper The Tin Woodman- Now with a new name, the Emperor of Winkie Country rejoins his old friend Scarecrow to help him regain control of Oz.
Mr. Highly Magnified Woggle-Bug, Thoroughly Educated (H.M. Woggle-Bug, T.E.)- A large insect with great intellect, he helps come up with good ideas to aid Tip, Jack, Scarecrow, and Tin Woodman in their bid to reclaim the Emerald City.
The Gump- Brought back to life by the Powder of Life, the disembodied head of an elk-like creature is attached to a pair of sofas and given large leaves for wings. He is the main mode of transport for the group.
Ozma- The missing and true descendant for the rulership of Oz. In order to restore order to the land, Tip's party must locate her.
The story begins in the north section of Oz known as Gillikin Country. A young man named Tip makes a break for freedom from his cruel guardian Mombi. He brings along his creation Jack Pumpkinhead, who was brought to life by the Powder of Life, which is magic he stole from Mombi. Along the way, he also uses the powder on an abadoned sawhorse to act as Jack's steed. When Tip learns that an army wishes to seize control of the Emerald City and the whole Land of Oz in the process, he and Jack head to the city to warn its king, the Scarecrow. With the danger imminent, the king escapes with his new friends to join up with The Tin Woodman to lend a hand in restoring order. They also team with a large and genius Woggle-Bug who offers his great knowledge. The party decides the wise and powerful Good Witch of the South Glinda may have a plan to liberate the Emerald City from its captors. Glinda declares the only one who can rightfully rule Oz is the daughter of the King who was in power before The Wizard blew into town. So the mission is on to find the missing princess and finally restore Oz to its rightful ruler.
Much like the first story, the adventure takes place all over Oz, and there's no shortage of curiosities to behold. My favorite character in this installment is Jack Pumpkinhead for his amusing banter with the Scarecrow. As Jack is constantly worried about his fruit head being destroyed, Scarecrow always looks on the bright side by suggesting that he could make a good pie or his seeds could be used to produce more pumpkins. None of these things reassure Jack in the least. The story concludes with a twist that would make M. Night Shyamalan envious. So with an Oz-wide journey, cool new characters, light humor, and a clever ending, I highly recommend this story as I did for the previous installment.
In another example of "signs of the times", this story contains yet another word that meant one thing in the early 1900s, but has taken on a completely new meaning in the late 2000's. And it was a difference I wasn't even aware of. Apparently... ejaculate was another word for "shouting in an excited manner". Here's a sentence I could get away with a century ago but wouldn't dare say aloud now: "I may be a bit queer, but I'm gay about it! And I'll ejaculate it to anyone who has a problem with that!"
And... um... that's just the way it is.
The Lion King of the World
I haven't been a fan of pro-wrestling since 2003, but I'll always dive into the biographies of wrestling personalities I've been familiar with during my fandom. One of my favorites is Chris Irvine, who has had many nicknames throughout his career. But they've always revolved around his most well known alias: Chris Jericho. A Lion's Tale: Around the World in Spandex is the tome encasing a majority of Jericho's life that you have and haven't seen on television.
From his beginnings as the son of hockey legend Ted Irvine to becoming a legend in his own right, Chris Jericho's life is a success story where he set his goal to become a World Wrestling Federation superstar, and accomplished that and so much more along the way. He went on a world-wide tour through countries like Canada, Mexico, Germany, Japan, and various locations within the United States to build experience and reputation. And a lot of crazy stuff went down wherever he went, which Jericho is only too happy to recount for you.
Chris began training in the Hart Brothers Pro Wrestling Camp, despite the fact there was hardly a single Hart present. Even though it wasn't quite the infamous Hart Dungeon of legend, he did eventually find himself down there, too. He graduated the school along with another standout named Lance Storm and the two traveled to many shows around Canada together, usually paired as a tag team. The future Paragon of Virtue eventually found his way to Mexico where he adopted his Lion Heart moniker. It wasn't long before his face was plastered in magazines and TV... oh, and in the hearts of fans of course. He also went to Germany to participate in a tournament that was poorly organized. He spent some time in the now defunct US promotion Smoky Mountain Wrestling. Then it was off to the pro-wrestling paradise of Japan, competing in the WAR promotion. He participated in prestigious tournaments and even joined the heel (bad guy) group that inspired the nWo.
Feeling he was finally ready to make it big in America, Chris Jericho entered the original incarnation of Extreme Championship Wrestling and spends a brief time speaking of the chaotic atmosphere, provided by the fans and head honcho Paul Heyman. He lasted there for half a year before signing with the number two, although soon to be number one, wrestling company in the States, World Championship Wrestling. While there, Jericho was not only a conspiracy victim in a storyline, but real life as well. No matter how great his matches were or the fan reaction he was raising, the powers that be in WCW just did not want to get behind him, instead sticking with their guns and keeping Hogan and the New World Order in the spotlight. Much like most wrestlers who spent considerable time in Dubya Say Dubya, Jericho isn't too kind towards former boss Eric Bischoff.
Besides his wrestling career, Jericho takes time to discuss family and friend tragedies, meeting the love of his life, and his numerous forays into the music world. The latter cultivated when he joined the band Fozzy Osbourne, now shortened to just FOZZY. Originally, they only did covers, but now they create original pieces.
A Lion's Tale is a great and lengthy read, odd considering he hardly touches base with his World Wrestling Entertainment career. It's where he attained supreme stardom. Could this possibly mean a book chronicling Y2J's rise from the savior of the World Wrestling Federation to the King of World Wrestling Entertainment? After all, at the time of this writing (blogging) he is ready to set back in the squared circle with the WWE.
Chew on this for a while: Jericho has worked for Jim Cornette, Paul Heyman, Eric Bischoff, and Vince McMahon. How's that for a mind-fuck? If you had put those guys in the same room together in the late 90's, you'd have what's known in wrestling as a "shoot" fight. That means theatrics go out the window and the fists fly for real.
The book is loaded with Jericho's attitude, told in his own words. And I do mean own words, as he uses plenty that he's made up himself. As a writer who does that himself, I applaud him. Chris Jericho became a larger than life superstar and a greater rock and roll wrestler than Hulk Hogan. Everything Terry Bollea can do, Chris Irvine can do better. Hell, this book is worth reading just to find out what Hogan asked Jericho at the end of Owen Hart's funeral.
After turning the last page in this story, I gained a whole new outlook on the professional wrestling scene outside my own country. It also gave credibility to a phrase birthed after the boom period of wrestling's popularity ended. "Wrestling: In Canada, it's a tradition. In Japan, it's a sport. In Mexico, it's a religion. In America, it's a joke."
And that's just the way it is.
From his beginnings as the son of hockey legend Ted Irvine to becoming a legend in his own right, Chris Jericho's life is a success story where he set his goal to become a World Wrestling Federation superstar, and accomplished that and so much more along the way. He went on a world-wide tour through countries like Canada, Mexico, Germany, Japan, and various locations within the United States to build experience and reputation. And a lot of crazy stuff went down wherever he went, which Jericho is only too happy to recount for you.
Chris began training in the Hart Brothers Pro Wrestling Camp, despite the fact there was hardly a single Hart present. Even though it wasn't quite the infamous Hart Dungeon of legend, he did eventually find himself down there, too. He graduated the school along with another standout named Lance Storm and the two traveled to many shows around Canada together, usually paired as a tag team. The future Paragon of Virtue eventually found his way to Mexico where he adopted his Lion Heart moniker. It wasn't long before his face was plastered in magazines and TV... oh, and in the hearts of fans of course. He also went to Germany to participate in a tournament that was poorly organized. He spent some time in the now defunct US promotion Smoky Mountain Wrestling. Then it was off to the pro-wrestling paradise of Japan, competing in the WAR promotion. He participated in prestigious tournaments and even joined the heel (bad guy) group that inspired the nWo.
Feeling he was finally ready to make it big in America, Chris Jericho entered the original incarnation of Extreme Championship Wrestling and spends a brief time speaking of the chaotic atmosphere, provided by the fans and head honcho Paul Heyman. He lasted there for half a year before signing with the number two, although soon to be number one, wrestling company in the States, World Championship Wrestling. While there, Jericho was not only a conspiracy victim in a storyline, but real life as well. No matter how great his matches were or the fan reaction he was raising, the powers that be in WCW just did not want to get behind him, instead sticking with their guns and keeping Hogan and the New World Order in the spotlight. Much like most wrestlers who spent considerable time in Dubya Say Dubya, Jericho isn't too kind towards former boss Eric Bischoff.
Besides his wrestling career, Jericho takes time to discuss family and friend tragedies, meeting the love of his life, and his numerous forays into the music world. The latter cultivated when he joined the band Fozzy Osbourne, now shortened to just FOZZY. Originally, they only did covers, but now they create original pieces.
A Lion's Tale is a great and lengthy read, odd considering he hardly touches base with his World Wrestling Entertainment career. It's where he attained supreme stardom. Could this possibly mean a book chronicling Y2J's rise from the savior of the World Wrestling Federation to the King of World Wrestling Entertainment? After all, at the time of this writing (blogging) he is ready to set back in the squared circle with the WWE.
Chew on this for a while: Jericho has worked for Jim Cornette, Paul Heyman, Eric Bischoff, and Vince McMahon. How's that for a mind-fuck? If you had put those guys in the same room together in the late 90's, you'd have what's known in wrestling as a "shoot" fight. That means theatrics go out the window and the fists fly for real.
The book is loaded with Jericho's attitude, told in his own words. And I do mean own words, as he uses plenty that he's made up himself. As a writer who does that himself, I applaud him. Chris Jericho became a larger than life superstar and a greater rock and roll wrestler than Hulk Hogan. Everything Terry Bollea can do, Chris Irvine can do better. Hell, this book is worth reading just to find out what Hogan asked Jericho at the end of Owen Hart's funeral.
After turning the last page in this story, I gained a whole new outlook on the professional wrestling scene outside my own country. It also gave credibility to a phrase birthed after the boom period of wrestling's popularity ended. "Wrestling: In Canada, it's a tradition. In Japan, it's a sport. In Mexico, it's a religion. In America, it's a joke."
And that's just the way it is.
November 4, 2007
The Wizard of Oz: The Book
Like many great Hollywood films of this year, yesteryear, and probably next year, beloved classic The Wizard of Oz was adapted from a book. Written by L. Frank Baum in 1900, when queer meant strange and gay meant happy, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz was meant to be a modern fairytale devoid of all the depressing endings of Grimm's classics. They weren't called "Grimm" for nothing. If you only know this tale by the similarly titled movie, you'd probably be surprised to know that it's only the first of FOURTEEN stories that took place in the fantastic world of Oz. The only known sequels to the The Wizard of Oz film are the animated Journey Back to Oz and Return to Oz, the latter being one of my favorite movies. Walt Disney Studios, who produced Return to Oz, never took advantage of the cash cow the Oz series could have been. I'm not sure who holds the film rights to the books now, but I feel if they could get their act together they could produce a movie franchise of Lord of the Rings proportions.
There is always a debate about whether or not the book a movie is derived from is the superior version, but I feel The Wizard of Oz is different enough to stand on its own. While the movie is a whimsical musical, the original work is a darker tale full of unknown danger and amazing discoveries. Let's examine some of the unique qualities of the book:
-More oddball lands to explore and the citizens who reside in them.
-The Wicked Witch of the West isn't the "be all to end all" evil here.
-The Cowardly Lion is a real lion, and still talks.
-Glinda is the witch of the south, not the north, and only plays a part in the end.
-The slippers are silver rather than ruby.
-Descriptive origins of Scarecrow, Tin Woodman, and the Lion, as well as what they do with their lives at the conclusion.
-The Land of Oz is real as opposed to a dream.
-The story is far from over after the Wizard takes off in the balloon. If Metro Goldwyn Myer wanted to faithfully adapt the pages to celluloid, the movie would have been at least four hours as opposed to 103 minutes. And it's not even wordy padding either, there's a lot more to the adventure than you've ever seen.
There are countless more differences between the two versions to make the book worth checking out for fans of the movie. I also wholly recommend the book to people who are fans of the fantasy genre itself. Personally, I'm not that big a fan of the movie, but the book it's based on I can't suggest for you to check out enough. Even though it was written at the start of the twentieth century, it doesn't contain any old-time words that have fallen into disuse. It's easy enough for today's children to understand, but a great read for all ages.
And that's just the way it is.
There is always a debate about whether or not the book a movie is derived from is the superior version, but I feel The Wizard of Oz is different enough to stand on its own. While the movie is a whimsical musical, the original work is a darker tale full of unknown danger and amazing discoveries. Let's examine some of the unique qualities of the book:
-More oddball lands to explore and the citizens who reside in them.
-The Wicked Witch of the West isn't the "be all to end all" evil here.
-The Cowardly Lion is a real lion, and still talks.
-Glinda is the witch of the south, not the north, and only plays a part in the end.
-The slippers are silver rather than ruby.
-Descriptive origins of Scarecrow, Tin Woodman, and the Lion, as well as what they do with their lives at the conclusion.
-The Land of Oz is real as opposed to a dream.
-The story is far from over after the Wizard takes off in the balloon. If Metro Goldwyn Myer wanted to faithfully adapt the pages to celluloid, the movie would have been at least four hours as opposed to 103 minutes. And it's not even wordy padding either, there's a lot more to the adventure than you've ever seen.
There are countless more differences between the two versions to make the book worth checking out for fans of the movie. I also wholly recommend the book to people who are fans of the fantasy genre itself. Personally, I'm not that big a fan of the movie, but the book it's based on I can't suggest for you to check out enough. Even though it was written at the start of the twentieth century, it doesn't contain any old-time words that have fallen into disuse. It's easy enough for today's children to understand, but a great read for all ages.
And that's just the way it is.
September 30, 2007
Godzilla Returns... In A New Medium
Godzilla Returns is the first in a four (almost five) novel series by Marc Cerasini. All are original stories featuring an all-star cast of kaiju that have co-starred with Godzilla over the years. Published in 1996, but set in 1998, this book takes place 44 years after Godzilla's first rampage in Tokyo back in 1954 (in case you didn't want to do the math). Apparently the events of the Showa or the Heisei era of Godzilla films didn't take place in what we'll refer to as The Cerasini Era. So things have been quiet in the near half-century since the kaiju king last appeared. This particular book seems reminiscent of the movie The Return of Godzilla, or Godzilla 1985 on our side of the ocean (if you're reading this in America). Aside from the similar sounding title, Godzilla is the sole monster in this book, who awakens and revisits his old stomping ground of Tokyo.
A Russian nuclear submarine is crushed by a U.S.O. (unidentified swimming object, I made that up) after their missile defense and evasive maneuvers fail. Excavators observe that the radiation emitted from the "decommissioned" sub is gone and can offer no explanation on what occurred. Two years later, more unexplained ocean disasters take place, but it isn't until one such wreck leaves survivors behind that the world discovers that Godzilla lives.
Brian Shimura is a a young Japanese-American who has lived in the United States for his entire life. It's when his late father beckoned him to revisit his homeland that Brian decided to take up a newspaper internship at INN (Independent News Network) in Tokyo. He meets American teenager Nick Gordon, a science correspondent in training at INN who is also going to be his roommate. While Brian doesn't have much of a distinct personality, Nick is a brash and girl-crazy delinquent. I suppose the writer expected the reader to get into a character like this, but you'll probably hate him.
The day following an evening of experiencing the Tokyo nightlife, Brian meets May McGovern, the boss' personal assistant who we discover is the former love interest of Nick. May introduces Brian to Everett "Boss Gaijin" Endicott III, the chief of the Tokyo news bureau. It turns out that the boss hates Nick Gordon as much as you will by the time the book ends. Then Brian meets Yoshi Masahara, a young Japanese man who is one of the best cameramen on their side of the Pacific.
As soon as the Japanese government learns that Godzilla has been causing trouble in the Sea of Japan, Brian, Nick and Yoshi are secretly put on assignment to cover the monster's advance. A meeting is held in Endicott's office, and we are introduced to the world's two top Godzilla experts: molecular biologist Dr. Hiroshi Nobeyama and Admiral Maxwell B. Willis, who turns out to be Brian's uncle. After a briefing by Dr. Nobeyama's assistant, Lieutenant Emiko Takado, the crew is relocated to a research vessel in the Sea of Japan to monitor the King of the Monsters as he does battle with the Japanese Self-Defense Force. The radioactive dinosaur is unfazed by the barrage of missiles and gunfire by the various ships and helicopters, and the attack is called off after he destroys a few of them.
A meeting is held where Dr. Nobeyama concludes his theory that conventional weapons can't harm Godzilla are correct. Meanwhile, the gigantic antagonist finally lands on the Japanese island of Honshu, where the army opposes him with shells full of cadmium, a substance used to contain nuclear fires. But both those and napalm attacks did little more than to enrage the Big G as he fought back and took away the lives and habitats of thousands of Japanese.
After they were split up to cover Godzilla's path of destruction from different angles, Brian, Nick, Yoshi, and Lt. Takado are reunited. However, it is only temporary as Brian and Nick are fired from INN, Endicott claiming that it was a measure to be taken to protect both their lives as well as their imminently successful futures. But instead of taking a helicopter back home as they were ordered, Nick and Brian hop in a car to follow Godzilla's expected march through Tokyo. The monster finally does emerge in Tokyo Bay and trashes the Self-Defense Forces' pitiful attempts at repelling him, including knocking down a barrier of high-tension wires that we've seen used against him so many times before. The story details the chase of the two former INN interns as they "tail" Godzilla at close range and the high danger they face. The living nuclear weapon soon takes out Tokyo Tower, where a small crew of INN reporters, camera people, and Yoshi Masahara were broadcasting. Nick and Brian soon come upon INN Headquarters, now nothing more than a pile of rubble. There they discover Endicott, who said he sent everyone home except for May McGovern, who was in the building when it collapsed. Nick and Brian dig through the debris to find her and they manage to pull her out of the elevator where she was safely trapped. A helicopter containing Yoshi, who managed to escape Tokyo Tower before its collapse, sets up a camera to broadcast a final news report.
Since they failed to convince various politicians and special interest groups about Godzilla's powers and intentions earlier, Dr. Nobeyama and Admiral Willis secretly concocted a plan that they were certain would lure Godzilla away from their homeland. A device which imitated the call of birds was loaded onto a plane and flown over the invincible kaiju. Godzilla's brain, like that of dinosaurs in which they are bird-like, started to follow the plane as Nobeyama and Willis flew towards the Mariana Trench. They dive bombed into the water, taking both their lives and Godzilla with them.
All in all, a very worthy edition to Godzilla lore, although it does exist in its own chronology. As I said before, you can tell Marc Cerasini is a fan of the big guy and it shows. You'll probably want to read the three sequels, especially since familiar kaiju from the movies show up in droves. Bob Eggleton, himself a major Godzilla fan, created a fantastic cover for this and most other Random House books for this franchise. Cerasini does an awesome job describing what it feels like to take a direct hit from Godzilla's radioactive breath. Burning clothes, melting skin, the works. It's a slow and painful death that will make you wish you were squished under his massive foot instead.
There are some homages paid to the scenes that American distributors inserted into the films Godzilla and The Return of Godzilla when there were released in the States. For those who aren't in the know, Raymond Burr's Steve Martin character is not in the original Japanese films. Anyway, Nick Gordon makes reference to a movie documentary and book based upon Steve Martin's point of view during Godzilla's original invasion. It even mentions that Martin was portrayed by Burr in the documentary. And as a nod to Major McDonahue in the 1985 rendition, he occasionally refers to the Big G as "Wonder Lizard", giving you another reason to hate Nick Gordon.
Most of Godzilla's journey takes place in the ocean, starting with his awakening, his initial destruction of several commuter and fishing boats, his first assault with the JSDF, and the instances when he was completely submerged, leaving the world wondering where he would strike next. Joe Mauceri of World of Fandom calls it "a high-sea adventure" and "an homage to Herman Melville's Moby Dick", in which the big black leviathan is a stand in for the big white whale. Once again drawing comparisons to The Return of Godzilla is the ending, although there is the slight twist of the heroes who utilized the bird-call device sacrificing themselves.
And in what can be seen as a sad ending, main character Brian is the only one who doesn't end up with an Asian girlfriend, and for that, he has my highest level of sympathy.
And that's just the way it is.
A Russian nuclear submarine is crushed by a U.S.O. (unidentified swimming object, I made that up) after their missile defense and evasive maneuvers fail. Excavators observe that the radiation emitted from the "decommissioned" sub is gone and can offer no explanation on what occurred. Two years later, more unexplained ocean disasters take place, but it isn't until one such wreck leaves survivors behind that the world discovers that Godzilla lives.
Brian Shimura is a a young Japanese-American who has lived in the United States for his entire life. It's when his late father beckoned him to revisit his homeland that Brian decided to take up a newspaper internship at INN (Independent News Network) in Tokyo. He meets American teenager Nick Gordon, a science correspondent in training at INN who is also going to be his roommate. While Brian doesn't have much of a distinct personality, Nick is a brash and girl-crazy delinquent. I suppose the writer expected the reader to get into a character like this, but you'll probably hate him.
The day following an evening of experiencing the Tokyo nightlife, Brian meets May McGovern, the boss' personal assistant who we discover is the former love interest of Nick. May introduces Brian to Everett "Boss Gaijin" Endicott III, the chief of the Tokyo news bureau. It turns out that the boss hates Nick Gordon as much as you will by the time the book ends. Then Brian meets Yoshi Masahara, a young Japanese man who is one of the best cameramen on their side of the Pacific.
As soon as the Japanese government learns that Godzilla has been causing trouble in the Sea of Japan, Brian, Nick and Yoshi are secretly put on assignment to cover the monster's advance. A meeting is held in Endicott's office, and we are introduced to the world's two top Godzilla experts: molecular biologist Dr. Hiroshi Nobeyama and Admiral Maxwell B. Willis, who turns out to be Brian's uncle. After a briefing by Dr. Nobeyama's assistant, Lieutenant Emiko Takado, the crew is relocated to a research vessel in the Sea of Japan to monitor the King of the Monsters as he does battle with the Japanese Self-Defense Force. The radioactive dinosaur is unfazed by the barrage of missiles and gunfire by the various ships and helicopters, and the attack is called off after he destroys a few of them.
A meeting is held where Dr. Nobeyama concludes his theory that conventional weapons can't harm Godzilla are correct. Meanwhile, the gigantic antagonist finally lands on the Japanese island of Honshu, where the army opposes him with shells full of cadmium, a substance used to contain nuclear fires. But both those and napalm attacks did little more than to enrage the Big G as he fought back and took away the lives and habitats of thousands of Japanese.
After they were split up to cover Godzilla's path of destruction from different angles, Brian, Nick, Yoshi, and Lt. Takado are reunited. However, it is only temporary as Brian and Nick are fired from INN, Endicott claiming that it was a measure to be taken to protect both their lives as well as their imminently successful futures. But instead of taking a helicopter back home as they were ordered, Nick and Brian hop in a car to follow Godzilla's expected march through Tokyo. The monster finally does emerge in Tokyo Bay and trashes the Self-Defense Forces' pitiful attempts at repelling him, including knocking down a barrier of high-tension wires that we've seen used against him so many times before. The story details the chase of the two former INN interns as they "tail" Godzilla at close range and the high danger they face. The living nuclear weapon soon takes out Tokyo Tower, where a small crew of INN reporters, camera people, and Yoshi Masahara were broadcasting. Nick and Brian soon come upon INN Headquarters, now nothing more than a pile of rubble. There they discover Endicott, who said he sent everyone home except for May McGovern, who was in the building when it collapsed. Nick and Brian dig through the debris to find her and they manage to pull her out of the elevator where she was safely trapped. A helicopter containing Yoshi, who managed to escape Tokyo Tower before its collapse, sets up a camera to broadcast a final news report.
Since they failed to convince various politicians and special interest groups about Godzilla's powers and intentions earlier, Dr. Nobeyama and Admiral Willis secretly concocted a plan that they were certain would lure Godzilla away from their homeland. A device which imitated the call of birds was loaded onto a plane and flown over the invincible kaiju. Godzilla's brain, like that of dinosaurs in which they are bird-like, started to follow the plane as Nobeyama and Willis flew towards the Mariana Trench. They dive bombed into the water, taking both their lives and Godzilla with them.
All in all, a very worthy edition to Godzilla lore, although it does exist in its own chronology. As I said before, you can tell Marc Cerasini is a fan of the big guy and it shows. You'll probably want to read the three sequels, especially since familiar kaiju from the movies show up in droves. Bob Eggleton, himself a major Godzilla fan, created a fantastic cover for this and most other Random House books for this franchise. Cerasini does an awesome job describing what it feels like to take a direct hit from Godzilla's radioactive breath. Burning clothes, melting skin, the works. It's a slow and painful death that will make you wish you were squished under his massive foot instead.
There are some homages paid to the scenes that American distributors inserted into the films Godzilla and The Return of Godzilla when there were released in the States. For those who aren't in the know, Raymond Burr's Steve Martin character is not in the original Japanese films. Anyway, Nick Gordon makes reference to a movie documentary and book based upon Steve Martin's point of view during Godzilla's original invasion. It even mentions that Martin was portrayed by Burr in the documentary. And as a nod to Major McDonahue in the 1985 rendition, he occasionally refers to the Big G as "Wonder Lizard", giving you another reason to hate Nick Gordon.
Most of Godzilla's journey takes place in the ocean, starting with his awakening, his initial destruction of several commuter and fishing boats, his first assault with the JSDF, and the instances when he was completely submerged, leaving the world wondering where he would strike next. Joe Mauceri of World of Fandom calls it "a high-sea adventure" and "an homage to Herman Melville's Moby Dick", in which the big black leviathan is a stand in for the big white whale. Once again drawing comparisons to The Return of Godzilla is the ending, although there is the slight twist of the heroes who utilized the bird-call device sacrificing themselves.
And in what can be seen as a sad ending, main character Brian is the only one who doesn't end up with an Asian girlfriend, and for that, he has my highest level of sympathy.
And that's just the way it is.
September 4, 2007
Penny Arcade is Weird/Bischoff Creates Cash
With a fifty dollar gift card for Barnes & Noble I received for my birthday, I headed down to the bookstore to cash in my prize. Which store? Is your reading comprehension really that bad?
Read in a couple of days was Penny Arcade Volume 4: Birds Are Weird. The latest compilation of strips for obscenely popular web comic Penny Arcade archives their works from the year 2003 A.D. Much like their previous graphic novel titles, such as Attack of the Bacon Robots, there is no commentary about the oddities of our avian adversaries, just cover art where our heroes keep a cautious eye on a lone pigeon.
Highlights of this volume include: Cardboard Tube Samurai epics, the grand voyage of Fruit Fucker, Charles chicanery, N-Gage bashing, and Electronics Boutique's (now Gamestop) war veteran manager Frank adding Gabe's pants to what must be a grand collection. But perhaps most important, the Pac-Man watch changes wrists again! One of my favorite comics regards wholly defunct gaming company Acclaim's... "claim" to cease its support for Nintendo's Gamecube gaming system. "That was awful nice of them," chimes Gabe.
The second book I tackled was mammoth sized. So big that it took me FIVE DAYS to read. However, when I finished reading Controversy Creates Ca$h, by Jeremy Roberts, I only wished it was longer. CCC is the biography of ultra-successful business man Eric Bischoff, an individual heralded by those who know him and despised by those who don't.
The book chronicles Eric's life from its humble beginnings in Detroit, all the way to the end of his tenure as General Manager for World Wrestling Entertainment's RAW brand. Sandwiched in between were such jobs as owning his own landscaping company, an overachieving salesman, creating televsion shows, and even crafting a kid's game. Not to mention his stint with Verne Gagne's American Wrestling Association to his meteoric rise in World Championship Wrestling.
The majority of Controversy is the touching story of boy finds company, boy gets company, boy loses company. Much like his early years as President of WCW, Eric pulls no punches when it comes to describing his co-workers, both past and present. He calls it like he sees it and tells his side of the story on such matters like the firing of Steve Austin, why Nitro debuted head to head with RAW, and what went wrong when Hulk Hogan was "fired" at Bash at the Beach 2000. Chances are high that you're a wrestling fan if you purchase this book, and you won't be disappointed with the content. Unless you're expecting a lot of accounts of locker room mischief. Bischoff instead focuses on the corporate world of Turner (which was bought out by Time Warner, which is bought out by AOL), which turns out was far more hectic and political than a roster of wrestlers jockeying for position.
Like all biographies from controversial sports figures, you should be leery on whether or not all the accounts are presented factually. Maybe the book's subject padded some of the negative claims made about them. For years, the Internet Wrestling Community has been doing everything in their power to discredit the man they unaffectionately referred to as "Uncle Eric", and now for the first time, Bischoff is afforded the chance to clear his name.
The book has been criticized for shining a heavenly light on World Wrestling Entertainment's CEO Vince McMahon. Maybe if they read it past the prologue, they would have found that Eric not only gloats about his Nitro beating McMahon's RAW in the ratings for a year and a half, but also takes credit for the WWE's current winning formula. Maybe there's a chance that two successful business men have respect for each other?
Final warning: Reading this book will likely change your negative opinions on Mr. Bischoff. If my review was too pro-Bischoff for you, may I recommend you check out Ric Flair's To Be The Man. The Nature Boy sucker punches Eric while he's on the phone in that one.
Now I just need to decide what to spend the remaining $15.82 balance on my gift card on.
And that's just the way it is.
Read in a couple of days was Penny Arcade Volume 4: Birds Are Weird. The latest compilation of strips for obscenely popular web comic Penny Arcade archives their works from the year 2003 A.D. Much like their previous graphic novel titles, such as Attack of the Bacon Robots, there is no commentary about the oddities of our avian adversaries, just cover art where our heroes keep a cautious eye on a lone pigeon.
Highlights of this volume include: Cardboard Tube Samurai epics, the grand voyage of Fruit Fucker, Charles chicanery, N-Gage bashing, and Electronics Boutique's (now Gamestop) war veteran manager Frank adding Gabe's pants to what must be a grand collection. But perhaps most important, the Pac-Man watch changes wrists again! One of my favorite comics regards wholly defunct gaming company Acclaim's... "claim" to cease its support for Nintendo's Gamecube gaming system. "That was awful nice of them," chimes Gabe.
The second book I tackled was mammoth sized. So big that it took me FIVE DAYS to read. However, when I finished reading Controversy Creates Ca$h, by Jeremy Roberts, I only wished it was longer. CCC is the biography of ultra-successful business man Eric Bischoff, an individual heralded by those who know him and despised by those who don't.
The book chronicles Eric's life from its humble beginnings in Detroit, all the way to the end of his tenure as General Manager for World Wrestling Entertainment's RAW brand. Sandwiched in between were such jobs as owning his own landscaping company, an overachieving salesman, creating televsion shows, and even crafting a kid's game. Not to mention his stint with Verne Gagne's American Wrestling Association to his meteoric rise in World Championship Wrestling.
The majority of Controversy is the touching story of boy finds company, boy gets company, boy loses company. Much like his early years as President of WCW, Eric pulls no punches when it comes to describing his co-workers, both past and present. He calls it like he sees it and tells his side of the story on such matters like the firing of Steve Austin, why Nitro debuted head to head with RAW, and what went wrong when Hulk Hogan was "fired" at Bash at the Beach 2000. Chances are high that you're a wrestling fan if you purchase this book, and you won't be disappointed with the content. Unless you're expecting a lot of accounts of locker room mischief. Bischoff instead focuses on the corporate world of Turner (which was bought out by Time Warner, which is bought out by AOL), which turns out was far more hectic and political than a roster of wrestlers jockeying for position.
Like all biographies from controversial sports figures, you should be leery on whether or not all the accounts are presented factually. Maybe the book's subject padded some of the negative claims made about them. For years, the Internet Wrestling Community has been doing everything in their power to discredit the man they unaffectionately referred to as "Uncle Eric", and now for the first time, Bischoff is afforded the chance to clear his name.
The book has been criticized for shining a heavenly light on World Wrestling Entertainment's CEO Vince McMahon. Maybe if they read it past the prologue, they would have found that Eric not only gloats about his Nitro beating McMahon's RAW in the ratings for a year and a half, but also takes credit for the WWE's current winning formula. Maybe there's a chance that two successful business men have respect for each other?
Final warning: Reading this book will likely change your negative opinions on Mr. Bischoff. If my review was too pro-Bischoff for you, may I recommend you check out Ric Flair's To Be The Man. The Nature Boy sucker punches Eric while he's on the phone in that one.
Now I just need to decide what to spend the remaining $15.82 balance on my gift card on.
And that's just the way it is.
August 22, 2007
Who's Afraid of Edward Albee?
I just completed reading Edward Albee's Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf, another book version of a somehow "popular" play. The front cover proclaims it as "the most talked-about drama of the last ten years." Most likely on how atrocious it is. It received the New York Drama Critics Circle Award and the Tony Awards as the Best Play of the 1962-63 season. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess it was the only play during that season.
This book features a small bio of Albee, and mentions that he began his writing career with poetry and novels, which he himself thought weren't good. So he decided to turn his sights to big theater productions to torture people. People who apparently didn't know much about what's good. I mean, I did mention all the praise his plays, including Virginia Woolf, received.
A question you've surely wondered upon hearing of this story's title is "who is Virginia Woolf"? Upon reading the book, I can assure you that Virginia Woolf is... nothing. The book title itself is a line in some nonsensical poem the loonies break out singing for no reason at all at certain points in the book. The characters, or maybe just the author himself, belong in an asylum. Now I realize all the characters are supposed to be drunk throughout most of the story, but you can see in the beginning that two of them are screwed up in the head long before alcohol enters their systems. Now that I think about it, if you're the kind of person that enjoys watching your friends getting sloshed out of their minds, you might like this story.
There are only four characters in this book. The entire play takes place at a house on the campus of a New England College. A Streetcar Named Desire was shorter, with more characters, and was wholly more interesting. The premise is something along the lines of what's real and what's fake in the lives of two of the characters that you could only "get" if you dissected the book. With a fine tooth comb. Those last two sentences made more sense than this story's plot. The play-viewing audience didn't have such a luxury to cross examine this story, so rather than seem uneducated and unrefined, they claimed what a masterpiece the spectacle they just saw was to impress the rest of us who didn't get it. Apparently, a movie studio comprised of lunatics themselves thought this play would make a good film, which means it is forever burned onto celluloid to horrify and mislead people into thinking what a "timeless classic" this dreck is.
I know people will end up telling me the "meanings" behind the more confusing aspects of the story. Hidden meanings. You're not supposed to have "insider knowledge" that your audience isn't privy to. That'd be like if I wrote a story about Jose Canseco and Sammy Sosa. See? You don't know what the hell I'm talking about because it's an inside joke shared between me and two others. But that didn't stop me from making an entry in my web comic about it...
Following this book, I sifted through the case containing my father's books from his youth and discovered Romeo and Juliet. But the book is a neutered iteration, meaning it's rewritten to be more comprehensive to a modern (read: modern back when my father was a lad) audience. In addition, it decided to help us out more by inserting explanations throughout the book in case we still couldn't understand. Jeez, if it's that hard for you, invest in the Cliff's Notes version. So I'm abandoning Shakespeare's masterpiece until I can find an unaltered version.
And that's just the way it is.
This book features a small bio of Albee, and mentions that he began his writing career with poetry and novels, which he himself thought weren't good. So he decided to turn his sights to big theater productions to torture people. People who apparently didn't know much about what's good. I mean, I did mention all the praise his plays, including Virginia Woolf, received.
A question you've surely wondered upon hearing of this story's title is "who is Virginia Woolf"? Upon reading the book, I can assure you that Virginia Woolf is... nothing. The book title itself is a line in some nonsensical poem the loonies break out singing for no reason at all at certain points in the book. The characters, or maybe just the author himself, belong in an asylum. Now I realize all the characters are supposed to be drunk throughout most of the story, but you can see in the beginning that two of them are screwed up in the head long before alcohol enters their systems. Now that I think about it, if you're the kind of person that enjoys watching your friends getting sloshed out of their minds, you might like this story.
There are only four characters in this book. The entire play takes place at a house on the campus of a New England College. A Streetcar Named Desire was shorter, with more characters, and was wholly more interesting. The premise is something along the lines of what's real and what's fake in the lives of two of the characters that you could only "get" if you dissected the book. With a fine tooth comb. Those last two sentences made more sense than this story's plot. The play-viewing audience didn't have such a luxury to cross examine this story, so rather than seem uneducated and unrefined, they claimed what a masterpiece the spectacle they just saw was to impress the rest of us who didn't get it. Apparently, a movie studio comprised of lunatics themselves thought this play would make a good film, which means it is forever burned onto celluloid to horrify and mislead people into thinking what a "timeless classic" this dreck is.
I know people will end up telling me the "meanings" behind the more confusing aspects of the story. Hidden meanings. You're not supposed to have "insider knowledge" that your audience isn't privy to. That'd be like if I wrote a story about Jose Canseco and Sammy Sosa. See? You don't know what the hell I'm talking about because it's an inside joke shared between me and two others. But that didn't stop me from making an entry in my web comic about it...
Following this book, I sifted through the case containing my father's books from his youth and discovered Romeo and Juliet. But the book is a neutered iteration, meaning it's rewritten to be more comprehensive to a modern (read: modern back when my father was a lad) audience. In addition, it decided to help us out more by inserting explanations throughout the book in case we still couldn't understand. Jeez, if it's that hard for you, invest in the Cliff's Notes version. So I'm abandoning Shakespeare's masterpiece until I can find an unaltered version.
And that's just the way it is.
August 5, 2007
A Journey To The Streetcar Named Desire
This entry will contain reviews of two stories I recently finished reading: a novel and a play.
A Journey to the Center of the Earth was written by a not-so-obscure author named Jules Verne. I actually read it by my own will, not against it. It seems most people may only read classical literature if assigned to by one of their English professors. But as a budding novelist myself, I feel that I should be familiar with most of the writings by the pioneers of my trade. Now there's no requirement for any writer to read the classics, and by no means am I being forced. The reason these stories earn the distinction of "classic" is because they're still heavily regarded today because of their quality. And most, if not all, of the more celebrated pieces of literature have already been made into movies of differing value, some even more than once.
A Journey was written in 1986. Wait, that was the date of the First Signet Classic Printing. It was actually penned/penciled/inked in 1864. Truth be told, I actually hated Verne's writing style after attempting to read a couple of his books in school, 20,00 Leagues Under The Sea being one of them. I guess my brain hadn't fully developed, because when I recently started A Journey I could hardly set it down and understood it all. Well, except for a lot of the scientific explanations. You see, it's been documented that Verne likes to explain the science in a lot of the missions and devices seen in his works. I see the value in this, as it brings an air of logic to his story, even if it is fictional, but it would most likely turn off readers nowadays with short attention spans that require non-stop action to be thrown at them. The scientific musings are shared between...
The main characters: Professor Hardwigg, his nineteen-year-old nephew Harry, and their Icelandic guide Hans. The story opens in their house in Germany, with the Professor boasting about an old book he purchased and an encrypted message that was found within. After about a day of both Harry and his uncle trying to decipher the code, it's Harry who accidentally discovers the translation. Immediately, Hardwigg plans for the expedition to the portal into the Earth's interior as described in the note. Jules Verne supplied the characters very brilliantly with the necessary provisions to survive such an arduous trek. The story becomes more addictive when the characters finally make it inside the Earth, because you want to know what they'll find within. Despite the fact the narrator (Harry) tells us that the book is an account of his journey after he returned from it, there are many times you wonder if he's going to expire anyway.
My favorite character in A Journey is neither the Uncle Hardwigg or nephew Harry. It's actually Hans, their hardworking guide during their tour of the bowels of this big crazy rock we call home. As long as he receives payment every week, he'll do his job without complaint. He is silent through most of the journey, usually only speaking a word or two in his native tongue to inform the Professor of what to look out for. Silent, resourceful, all business. Kinda like myself.
There's a point towards the end of the book where Harry is referred to as "Henry" for quite a few pages, although it reverts back to Harry by the finish. An error is editing, or a pet name given to him by Hardwigg?
My next foray into reading was going to be Herman Melville's Billy Budd, Foretopman, but the problem that prevented me from enjoying Verne's works in the past now affects me in the present. Though written in English, it's all too foreign to me. To make matters worse, it's full of words which seem to have fallen into disuse over the years. Even my spell checker is telling me that it doesn't believe "foretopman" is a real word. But I guess one thing I would have in common with my literary predecessor is that we invent words without telling anyone and slyly pass them off as real, convincing those who read them that they are "high level" words, only used by the Masters of English.
So I gave up on Billy Budd after the second chapter. That's when I looked through my father's old book collection he acquired for his school years and found another classic called A Streetcar Named Desire, the play by Tennessee Williams adapted into book form. Williams also wrote Cat On A Hot Tin Roof, but not Fiddler On The Roof. It was written, or at least copyrighted, in 1947. It's also where the famous line "I have always depended on the kindness of strangers" originated. I'm pretty sure most of you only know this story as being "performed" on The Simpsons, but that was only a parody. A Streetcar contains twelve active characters, the main ones being Blanche DuBois, her sister Stella and brother-in-law Stanley Kowalski (no relation to Killer). Blanche, a wilted Southern Belle, is trying to escape her old life by moving in with her sister and brother-in-law in their house in New Orleans. Stanley is a chauvinistic blue-collar worker whose personality naturally clashes with Blanche's. He also tends to hit his wife Stella when he gets angry, then apologizes profusely for his behavior which always brings her back to his stable. I'm just glad this is only a work of fiction and a situation like that couldn't possibly occur in real life. The story also contains undertones on homosexuality and pedophilia, two subjects which I thought were never referred to back then.
I finished the whole book... or should I say play... in a day, starting on my lunch period at work, continuing when I got home, and then finishing it before going to sleep. Fun fact: the original play featured a then-unknown Marlon Brando as Stanley, who didn't even get top billing.
I'm now reading another play adaptation called Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? by Edward Albee. This ancient tome is priced at ninety-five cents, which should probably give you an idea of how old this edition is. The pages are also falling out, and they have that aged pulp stink which will make this story hard to read on an empty stomach during lunch.
Tennessee Williams. Could I get away with calling myself Rhode Island Gannon?
And that's just the way it is.
A Journey to the Center of the Earth was written by a not-so-obscure author named Jules Verne. I actually read it by my own will, not against it. It seems most people may only read classical literature if assigned to by one of their English professors. But as a budding novelist myself, I feel that I should be familiar with most of the writings by the pioneers of my trade. Now there's no requirement for any writer to read the classics, and by no means am I being forced. The reason these stories earn the distinction of "classic" is because they're still heavily regarded today because of their quality. And most, if not all, of the more celebrated pieces of literature have already been made into movies of differing value, some even more than once.
A Journey was written in 1986. Wait, that was the date of the First Signet Classic Printing. It was actually penned/penciled/inked in 1864. Truth be told, I actually hated Verne's writing style after attempting to read a couple of his books in school, 20,00 Leagues Under The Sea being one of them. I guess my brain hadn't fully developed, because when I recently started A Journey I could hardly set it down and understood it all. Well, except for a lot of the scientific explanations. You see, it's been documented that Verne likes to explain the science in a lot of the missions and devices seen in his works. I see the value in this, as it brings an air of logic to his story, even if it is fictional, but it would most likely turn off readers nowadays with short attention spans that require non-stop action to be thrown at them. The scientific musings are shared between...
The main characters: Professor Hardwigg, his nineteen-year-old nephew Harry, and their Icelandic guide Hans. The story opens in their house in Germany, with the Professor boasting about an old book he purchased and an encrypted message that was found within. After about a day of both Harry and his uncle trying to decipher the code, it's Harry who accidentally discovers the translation. Immediately, Hardwigg plans for the expedition to the portal into the Earth's interior as described in the note. Jules Verne supplied the characters very brilliantly with the necessary provisions to survive such an arduous trek. The story becomes more addictive when the characters finally make it inside the Earth, because you want to know what they'll find within. Despite the fact the narrator (Harry) tells us that the book is an account of his journey after he returned from it, there are many times you wonder if he's going to expire anyway.
My favorite character in A Journey is neither the Uncle Hardwigg or nephew Harry. It's actually Hans, their hardworking guide during their tour of the bowels of this big crazy rock we call home. As long as he receives payment every week, he'll do his job without complaint. He is silent through most of the journey, usually only speaking a word or two in his native tongue to inform the Professor of what to look out for. Silent, resourceful, all business. Kinda like myself.
There's a point towards the end of the book where Harry is referred to as "Henry" for quite a few pages, although it reverts back to Harry by the finish. An error is editing, or a pet name given to him by Hardwigg?
My next foray into reading was going to be Herman Melville's Billy Budd, Foretopman, but the problem that prevented me from enjoying Verne's works in the past now affects me in the present. Though written in English, it's all too foreign to me. To make matters worse, it's full of words which seem to have fallen into disuse over the years. Even my spell checker is telling me that it doesn't believe "foretopman" is a real word. But I guess one thing I would have in common with my literary predecessor is that we invent words without telling anyone and slyly pass them off as real, convincing those who read them that they are "high level" words, only used by the Masters of English.
So I gave up on Billy Budd after the second chapter. That's when I looked through my father's old book collection he acquired for his school years and found another classic called A Streetcar Named Desire, the play by Tennessee Williams adapted into book form. Williams also wrote Cat On A Hot Tin Roof, but not Fiddler On The Roof. It was written, or at least copyrighted, in 1947. It's also where the famous line "I have always depended on the kindness of strangers" originated. I'm pretty sure most of you only know this story as being "performed" on The Simpsons, but that was only a parody. A Streetcar contains twelve active characters, the main ones being Blanche DuBois, her sister Stella and brother-in-law Stanley Kowalski (no relation to Killer). Blanche, a wilted Southern Belle, is trying to escape her old life by moving in with her sister and brother-in-law in their house in New Orleans. Stanley is a chauvinistic blue-collar worker whose personality naturally clashes with Blanche's. He also tends to hit his wife Stella when he gets angry, then apologizes profusely for his behavior which always brings her back to his stable. I'm just glad this is only a work of fiction and a situation like that couldn't possibly occur in real life. The story also contains undertones on homosexuality and pedophilia, two subjects which I thought were never referred to back then.
I finished the whole book... or should I say play... in a day, starting on my lunch period at work, continuing when I got home, and then finishing it before going to sleep. Fun fact: the original play featured a then-unknown Marlon Brando as Stanley, who didn't even get top billing.
I'm now reading another play adaptation called Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? by Edward Albee. This ancient tome is priced at ninety-five cents, which should probably give you an idea of how old this edition is. The pages are also falling out, and they have that aged pulp stink which will make this story hard to read on an empty stomach during lunch.
Tennessee Williams. Could I get away with calling myself Rhode Island Gannon?
And that's just the way it is.
January 22, 2007
I'm Checkin' In
Originally posted June 14, 2006
I have not written here for a while. Probably due to the fact that not a whole lot is going on right now. And that I don't believe I have any audience at all. I'm looking into subscribing to a web site listing service so Googlers and Yahooligans can stumble across my page. If they're looking for web sites based on such subjects as "James Gannon, "Callous", "Idle", and "writing". All at the same time.
I recently finished reading a book called Catch-22, by Joseph Heller, written in 1961. My co-worker, Ray Gustafson, lent it to me thinking I might enjoy it. The book was in dilapidated condition after being in storage for a great many years. Sadly, the book didn't fare much better in my possession due to the fact I had to OPEN the thing several times. Both the wrinkled front and back covers fell off, and many flecks of paper tore off. This book was purchased back when a novel cost seventy-five cents. The book can also be considered a gift to me, as Ray consented to me holding onto it after finishing. You probably heard of the term "Catch-22" before. It's generally a situation you can't get out of because the solution somehow gets you tangled even further into your predicament. For example: The only way to get a credit card is to have a good credit history. And the only way to get a good credit history is by using a credit card. Trust me, I have first-hand experience. Where the hell was I? Oh yes, the book. I highly recommend it if you're a serious reader, because your comprehension skills must be refined to understand the bizarre writing style. The words are easy for those with low reading skills, but the way they're arranged throughout the novel is remarkable. It will play with your head, but if you "get it", you will thoroughly enjoy the read.
I haven't been "Brain Aging It" for a while. Too consumed with other games (Animal Crossing, New Super Mario Bros.), plus other aspects of my life. Sadly, writing and drawing hasn't been one of them. I need to organize my time better.
There was only one catch... and that was Catch-22.
I have not written here for a while. Probably due to the fact that not a whole lot is going on right now. And that I don't believe I have any audience at all. I'm looking into subscribing to a web site listing service so Googlers and Yahooligans can stumble across my page. If they're looking for web sites based on such subjects as "James Gannon, "Callous", "Idle", and "writing". All at the same time.
I recently finished reading a book called Catch-22, by Joseph Heller, written in 1961. My co-worker, Ray Gustafson, lent it to me thinking I might enjoy it. The book was in dilapidated condition after being in storage for a great many years. Sadly, the book didn't fare much better in my possession due to the fact I had to OPEN the thing several times. Both the wrinkled front and back covers fell off, and many flecks of paper tore off. This book was purchased back when a novel cost seventy-five cents. The book can also be considered a gift to me, as Ray consented to me holding onto it after finishing. You probably heard of the term "Catch-22" before. It's generally a situation you can't get out of because the solution somehow gets you tangled even further into your predicament. For example: The only way to get a credit card is to have a good credit history. And the only way to get a good credit history is by using a credit card. Trust me, I have first-hand experience. Where the hell was I? Oh yes, the book. I highly recommend it if you're a serious reader, because your comprehension skills must be refined to understand the bizarre writing style. The words are easy for those with low reading skills, but the way they're arranged throughout the novel is remarkable. It will play with your head, but if you "get it", you will thoroughly enjoy the read.
I haven't been "Brain Aging It" for a while. Too consumed with other games (Animal Crossing, New Super Mario Bros.), plus other aspects of my life. Sadly, writing and drawing hasn't been one of them. I need to organize my time better.
There was only one catch... and that was Catch-22.
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